When we were almost perfect. (chapter two!)
Katie:
Chapter two time?
hannahh:
"I had a weird dream last night.." Andrew mumbled. It was six in the morning. Me and Andrew always woke up so much earlier than Mom. He usually made us cereal but today we ate the left over pancakes.
I shoved a huge bite of pancakey goodness in my mouth and swallowed. "How so?" Andrew looked up from his plate and began "Well I was just like dreaming about when you were a toddler and when all we did was just have a good time. When dad would always help me with my homework. When he went to the park all the time. When we were always smiling. When you were only 3.." I'm eight now. Wow that was a long time ago. "But even when we were the same age we were now, only three days ago, we were so happy.." I said trailing off. "I know, but.." Andrew had became very interested in his feet at this moment. "Nevermind," He said and threw his plate into the dishwasher.
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We got home from school around 2:30. We came home to mom sitting on the couch wiping away tears. She faked a smile. "W-want me to help you with your homework, Jayden?" She asked trying to sound cheerful. I smiled hugely at her, trying to make her feel better. "Sure," I said over happily. Andrew had already ran up to his room to do his homework.
"Stupid math homework. Stupid spelling homework. Stupid homework." Andrew said angerly. Every little thing made him made lately.
I went up to my room with mom. She stood next my table giving me hints on which answer I should write. Mom knew I didn't get the best grades. She wouldn't get mad at me, she actually understood that my ADD kept me from learning that much in class. I'm not saying I'm dumb, it's just hard for me sometimes. I stood up from my chair, I felt so overwhelmed. I felt a rush of sadness. I felt so dumb. Andrew always got straight A's, no matter what! Ugh things like this make me wanna cry and scream. In fact that's exactly what I did. Sorry! I just don't have much self control. I'm only eight!!!
Mom rubbed my back and gave me a hug. "C'mon, honey, it's not that hard." She said comfortingly. I wiped my eyes and sat back down.
With mom helping me I finished my homework in only an hour and a half. That's really fast for me! "See! You finished your homework in half the normal time!" She said ruffling my hair. I smiled at her. She loved me and Andrew so much. She did everything for us. When Andrew complained about not having a brand new basketball every week, she went and bought him a brand new basketball, every week. When I complained about my peas and mashed potatoes touching, she got me those little plates with dividers. I was still smiling at my mom when I heard Andrew laughing and a voice that sounded a lot like Dad's. I looked out the window. "Dad?" I said, confused. Mom frowned. "James," She growled.
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"It's only been a couple of days and I miss you so much!" Andrew said hugging him.
"I miss you too, sport." James said. Andrew smiled brightly at his father. The man he loved so much was such a monster. Andrew always thought we were the perfect family. Boy was he wrong. He didn't hear the things his father called his mom when him and me fell asleep. He did see the bruises or hear the breaking dishes. He didn't know nothing. I didn't either. No one did. Not anyone. Well except for Mom. She knew everything.
"I was thinking about taking you and Jayden out Florida to go to Disney World and see your grandparents!" James said very excitedly. "Disney World!? Seriously?! But wait.. what about mom...?" Andrew replied. Dad shrugged and touched Andrew's shoulder. "What about her?"
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"I TOLD YOU TO NEVER COME BACK HERE AGAIN!" Jess screamed at her ex-husband. She lifted her hand and slapped him hard in the face.
James grabbed his right cheek, it was bright red and throbbing. He cursed loudly right in her face and then slapped her back.
And then, it was basically a blood bath..
Andrew screamed and cursed. The neighbors began to look out their windows. Their faces shocked. I was sitting under my window. Head in my hands. I couldn't believe it.
He screamed and kicked. I looked out my window and heard a loud crash. He had kicked over the trash can.
Andrew's face turned from anger to sadness. Tears streaming down his face. He wiped them away with his sleeve and ran in the house and then up to his room. I stood up and walked down the hall into his bedroom. He was standing by his window, looking like he just might pull his hair out or break the window. I started to talk.
"Just don't think about Dad. He's not worth it. Sure, he was always nice to us and mom... when we were around. But we just need to forget about it." I touched his shoulder and then pulled him into a hug.
"I guess.." He mumbled. I tried to smile at him. "How about you call Tess? She'd love to come over and hang out!" I said cheerfully. I knew he liked Tess. He said they were just friends but when I spied on th- I mean when I just happened to be peeking through the doorway into his room, they would be holding hands or she would be all giggly when Andrew said something not even funny. Then he looked sad. He scratched his head. "I would call her right this second.. but she's on vacation. She went to Big Bear for 3 weeks.." He replied glumly. I frowned. "I'm sorry.." He faked a smile. "It's alright, good night," He said and ruffled my hair. I smiled at him and shuffled off to my room.
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The next morning I had to go to tutoring really early in the morning. Mom just dropped me off because she had to get Andrew to his football game. "Hey mom, before we go I was just wondering-" Andrew began but Mom cut him off. "ANDREW! Why aren't you in your uniform!?" She asked very naggingly.
"Mom we change in the bathrooms, remember? Anyways, I was just wondering... why were you and Dad fighting anyways...?" He asked rubbing his arm. She sighed and touched my cheek. "Honey, please. It's not important.." She replied. I frowned.
"No, Mom, it IS important." He said very loudly. She sighed once more. "Let's just say he said something I didn't like.. about Jayden's... problems.." She answered looking away. Andrew looked confused. "P-problems? Jayden doesn't have any "problems!" He's perfectly normal and... and.. he's... really smart and.." Andrew said looking around. Mom put her hand on his shoulder. "Sweetheart, not now. I just haven't told you. I haven't even told Jayden, himself. Come on, let's just go to your game." Andrew looked at her. Hatred in his eyes. "I don't wanna go. I want Dad, I want Tess, I want Jayden. I don't want you. I don't wanna go to practice. I HATE YOU!" Andrew screeched. He shoved her away and ran up the stairs and slammed his door.
Theraven:
You don't suck at writing at all! In fact, you write a lot better than many others :)
A few useful tips:
* Try to avoid shots seen from above (unless they fit the story, of course). Try to go down on eye level with the characters. It lets the reader/viewer get more in touch with the character. It's just not that interesting to see too many pictures of the back or top of a head, and not the face. After all, it's the faces and reactions that really counts.
* Turn off the plumbbob and the speech bubbles with showheadlines off and plumbbobtoggle
* also try to part up the text, starting new lines when the other person is talking:
Quote
"I was thinking about taking you and Jayden out Florida to go to Disney World and see your grandparents!" James said very excitedly. "Disney World!? Seriously?! But wait.. what about mom...?" Andrew replied. Dad shrugged and touched Andrew's shoulder. "What about her?"
compared to this:
Quote
"I was thinking about taking you and Jayden out Florida to go to Disney World and see your grandparents!" James said very excitedly.
"Disney World!? Seriously?! But wait.. what about mom...?" Andrew replied.
Dad shrugged and touched Andrew's shoulder. "What about her?"
Then it is so much easier to read, and to know who is talking. Text without breaks, especially when centered, isn't very easy to read... :-\
hannahh:
Thank you!
Thanks for the tips! I have a hard time with those!
And thanks SO much for the cheats! I didn't have those and it really bugged me how I couldn't get rid of them!
I also messed up when typing it. As you can see most text is centered when they aren't suppose to be!
Carlwashere:
Yay! New chapter! ;D
Oh, by the way, if stuff gets accidentally centered and others not, you can use Ctrl+A to select everything, and the align to right button.
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