One Life: Episode 7 IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT (last page)
babyblue1387:
Thanks much guys! I really appreciate everyone's comments!
babyblue1387:
Sorry this took so long! I'm doing a couple contests, and I had to build the teahouse, even though you don't really get to see much of it.
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A couple months earlier, thugh, I did go to the teahouse with Tomihatsu. I think the experience added to my discomfort. I couldn't help feeling that I was inadequate and that Tomihatsu was showing off.
The ease with which she talked with the men and the other geisha put me to shame. There were so many ruels and guidelines, so many customs.
Yet, at the same time, I felt so pretty. The men complemented me on my beautiful complexion, on my resemblance to my sister and my mother.
They told me I should come around more ofted. Tomihatsu came over and told them that I probably wouldn't be coming around anymore. Next to me, she seemed infinately more graceful and pleasant.
She told them that I made music and that I'd be going on tour soon. Funny, how after all these years, people who are diehard fans of Girls Against The World and people who've never heard of us can occupy the same world. She said I didn't have the time for these types of social events. In that time, Tomihatsu made it known that I'd never be part of this world. No matter how much I looked like a geisha, I'd never really be one. I'd never be what my mother wanted me to be. The men expressed their regret at not being able to see me again. Tomihatsu escorted me out of the teahouse an hour later, and I felt really alone and out of place. I was really graeful to be back in my own world.
That really did weigh down on me, and I found myself thinking about that as I lay looking at my new babies. Twins. Maybe this whole thing with Tomihatsu wasn't worth it. Ayato was so proud and I couldn't dissapoint him. I smiled at him and wondered about that whole post-partum thing. I was definately feeling depressed. Tomihatsu hadn't been able to make the birth because she went oversears with her husband and children. Kimora and Lucien went on tour two days after I gave birth. Vara, Dias, Arin and Lordes were out with Takeshi (the triplets damn near have ADD, they're so hyper. Kimora and Takeshi just call them "passionate," but we all know that's a load of crap). Dionus was beaming with pride, but he was repeatedly stepping out to phone this new opera singer he met. I was feeling alone.
I can't say I exactly felt like killing my children. That would be a bit extreme. I did contemplate just running out, though. No one would blame me. At least that's what I tought laying in the hospital bed. I think, sometime during the night, I got a fever. I was beginning to be a little delusional. The reality of my age really hit me then. I was damn near 40, and I just had two babies. I was going to die before I saw my twins get married. Now, maybe it wasn't the most rational train of thought, but my mind didn't clear up until the doctor gave me some kind of medecine. Said I had a serious infection.
Karma's a total biotch, isn't she?
Kimora rushed back to be with me. She had reluctantly left Lucien in the hands of her manager and road mom/tutor. I know it was a hard decision for her, and she'll never have a problem with Karma. She didn't secretly wish her mother would get cancer and die a painfully slow death. Which actually happened. No, I'm afraid that the irony wasn't lost on me.
Ayato was worried when the doctor said that he'd have to check the babies to make sure they were ok. The doctor said the little brats' names, but I didn't recognize them. Ayato named them. I couldn't even remember what combination of beast they were. To make matters worse, I didn't care, and this scared me. My fever shot up overnight, and the doctors all rushed in.
I could hear Kimora throwing curse words at people, and the rapid click of camera shutters. I couldn't but wonder if I had even more than cause my mother's death to warrant this. Somehow, though, in the throes of a nasty infection, the idea came to me that I was punishing myself. Maybe I wasn't ready to forgive my mother, maybe now I had come to be mad at tomihatsu for being a prick. The only reason she had given moe the kimono was so she could flaunt her relationship with our mother in my face. Just as it occured to me that the only reason I went to the funeral at all was to confirm that my mother was dead gone; to make sure she wouldn't come back. It was evil and selfish--the way I had always seen my mother.
Some three days later, I awoke to find Tomihatsu standing over me. In that moment, I hated her more than I had ever hated another person in my life. She was looking at me and smiling, but in my fevered mind, I saw her smile as saying "serves you right, whore." She turned her back and walked out of the room, presumably leaving me to die. I guess that wasn't the cause because, shortly after she left, Ayato, Dionus, Kim, Takeshi, Vara, Lucien, Dias, Arin and Lordes all came rushing into the room.
I couldn't really see around them, but I had the distinc impression that TOmihatsu smile devily at me, as if to suggest that she was the one woh had poisoned me. Absurd, I know. Somehow, my family took my urge to kill as a sign of pain. That only made me angrier, and I think my fever went up a bit.
xgreydovex:
i absolutly L. O. V. E. this story.
update soon pretty please! :]
babyblue1387:
Taking pics for this is really hard, but I just love this story too! There will be a third part of this story. A kind of final interview with Kokoro as an elder.
babyblue1387:
Ok! Now we're getting to the juicy part!
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Th paparazzi were there when I was released from the hospital four months later.
Kimora yelled at them to please give me some room to breathe. When they didn't I threw a potted plant at them. They moved then.
Ayato brought the cildren in hopes that I'd want to see them, but I didn't care. He'd put them in some hideous outfits, and that only made things worse. I still didn't know their names, still didn't know if they were boys or girls, and still didn't care. Ayato did, and he was more concerned than ever.
He got me into some kind of conseling, and though I didn't want to admit it, I did slowly begin to feel better. The "doctor" said that I was greiving for my mother, but I didn't know how to express it. The meeting with Tomihatsu only brought my feelings of extreme guilt to the forefront. Slowly, I even began to understand that the babies were mine, not just Ayato's and that I had been me, and not him, who had given birth to them. I began to understand that I was depressed, which was why I wasn't caring that there were other children.
I was also told that I had two five month old baby girls. At the time, that was too much for me, and I lost it.
By the time my girls were one, I still didn't know their names, but I loved to play with them and cuddle them. They were beginning to talk and they recognized me as their mother. I had come to terms with having two babies so close to forty, and I completely ignored Tomihatsu, for the most part. I reconnected with my brother Onoe, who'd married Kimora's older sister Tang Mie. I didn't know they had been involved with each other, but that didn't surprise me at all. There were a lot of things I didn't know during that time. Like I didn't know, or realize, that things were working out better than doctors had hoped.
I could talk to Onoe all I wanted, and for as long as I wanted (which we did quite often), and I'd be fine. If I saw Tomihatsu crossing the street, and I was driving a car, I probably--no, undoubtedly--would have run her over. Which is probably why I'm not allowed to drive anymore.
Now, as I mentioned earlier, I could tell Kimora had become more serious, and was beginning to settle down. Her hair wasn't pink or blord, or some combination thereof anymore. Lucien's however, was. Kim and Takeshi had four beautiful children, and were as dedicated to each other as any old married couple, even though they never married. They did decide to offically commit to each other in a lovely ceremony.
Nothing big, nothing fancy, but beautiful and classinc nonetheless. She insisted on wearing white, though I told her she shouldn't. Her dress should have been so dark it made black look light. We had a good laugh. Then she asked me when Ayato and I would commit.
"We'll get married a little later," I said, winking at her. Yes, I had finally told Ayato that I loved him. Under the circumstances, it had more meaning to him. I'm glad I waited. It meant so much more to the both of us, then.
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