Moderator: Delete this thread if you want :)
Neeri:
Thank you, vickylougrl. Yeah shes a little messed up.
Hmm i see what you mean with your confusion, She didnt pass out, She just dont recall what happend realy due to the amount of alcohol she had put in to her system.
Its my first story and i messed up, it was 3 in the morning for me and i decided to make her not remember what happend with the guy instead of go back in to the sims and take pictures of it. A mistake.
Ive noticed alot of things while i wrote it, i was missing alot of describing pictures, I'm gonna keep that in mind for my next update, Sorr if i confused you.
And about that guy, Who knows? ;3 He might show up again.
My, Astral Faery, Thank you too! Yeah, But i would like them to be pointed out, Maybe in a PM or something. Because if i do go somewhere with this story in terms of making it great, I wouldnt want it to be filled with little flaws. If you get what i mean?
And yeah, Alex has a mysterious past, Why is her mom a drunk now? What happend to her dad? Why dosnt alex remember anything? Why does her mother hate her?
Muhahaha, So many questions that need answers.
And yes, I will keep it up!
Glamily:
i luv it! its a really interesting story so far.. also at the end i belive u meant were not where.. the one u used is like where is it.. hope that helps :D
Medagic:
I think it's really good someone who knows English only as a second language. I didn't notice any big or important mistakes.
Nice job!
steelguy:
Well, I like it - it's a very interesting and touching story - and it has far less mistakes than I've seen than some who speak English as a first language. :smile:
I had no problems in understanding the tale, but if you feedback, the only part that really stood out for me, was ...Alex is the root of all her problems and isnt soon to let her know just that...
I got the idea of what you meant, but "soon" doesn't fit there. You could use "hesitant" instead, or possibly "shy." Other than that, the best way to improve is to just keep doing it. :smile:
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