Title: A friend asked me to post this... Post by: Mooncat on October 27, 2009, 01:55:02 pm Here is a message from a former InSim member.
Hi all from Brat Let me say that this journey has not been an easy one for me. Ever since I fell down the stairs that night on June 5th because I passed out I have had to alter my life. I was given what should have been a simple treatment with a drug called Prednisone starting on July 9th, mine was a large dose. This was done to elimate the inflamation in my lungs. I was warned that this was an agressive treatmentby my Pulmonologist. I was one of the unlucky few that exhibited a medical induced psychosis as a side effect of this drug. Within 72 hours of starting the Prednisone I started seeing and hearing things and acting out aggressively. I called my pulmonologist and expressed my concerns about the depression, nervousness, confusion, paranoia, rage episodes, hallucinations and memory lose I was having. After 5 day I had Physical side efects of muscle pain,pain in hips, shoulders and back, severe joint pain, blurred vision, fatigue and weakness and chest pains during rage episodes. This message was fully not passed along to my pulmonologist, due to a foul up with the computers at his answering service. The only part of message he got was about the chest pains and insomnia.He wasn't inform depression, nervousness, confusion, paranoia, rage episodes and hallucinations or he would have discontinued the medicationat once. He prescribed nitro for the pain and I got a voice message that insomnia was a side effect of the drug at my dosage level. I slept maybe about 4 hours a day and usually 2 hours here and 1 hour or 30 to 45 minute naps. I misunderstood his voice message think that was the USUAL side effect of the drug. By the time I finally couldn't handle the basket case I become and talked to my pulmonologist in person, I let him know what was going on with me mentally, I had become dependent on the Prednisone had had to be weaned off of it. Anybody that feels I treated them badly I apologize, but compare to I put my Family through you had it easy. I was hell to be around and live with my family watch my mode swings. I was lucky that I physical did not act out against my family, but there were times it took that last ounce of my restraint not to, there were a few times I did get right up in people faces with a clinched fist. One night at the end of July, I had a bad night and tried to hurt myself. I really don’t remember why that at that level of Prednisone it plays with your memory if your sensitive to the medication... I had more test and doctors appointments. Then I found out a friend of 20 years of me and my wife had cancer, I held her son when he was only 2 hours old. One night she was pushed down the stairs by her husband. Her Husband would not drive her to the clinic or call an ambulance. I drove 60 mile out to her house at 2 am and drove her to Parkland hospital. I waited for her until they saw her 8 hours later and checked her in. She had 14 hair line fracture virtabra, she is luck that she can still walk. She sang at my wedding and has a beautiful voice. My Thoracic Surgeon did mince words with me; and he is one of the best in the area, “Mr. Brat your lungs look like ground glass inside from your cat scans”. So I had an open biopsy of my lungs, it is not a pleasant experience. They knock me out with an injection. Then they place the IV tube in my neck to be close to the heart in case the heart stops while I was knock out. While I underwent the procedure here’s what happen to me: The Surgeon cuts three holes in the side with my largest lung. Mine was on the right side. They spread your ribs apart. Then I had sample of my lungs tissue taken. Mine was from various locations total a square inch, or for my metric friends 25mm square. When the Surgeon was finishing up the last thing that happen to me was drainage tube was placed into me; mine was 3/8 by 18 inches. You live that with inside you for 3 days. They hook you to a device that drains fluid out of your chest cavity and place a vacuum on it. Then you wake up. If you had a broken rib that describes the pain. If you haven’t broken rib imagine you have a jack hammer hit your in the side in set on full. It was painful to the point of tears to take a deep breath, cough or touch that part of my body. You get a Morphine pain button or as I called it my best friend in the universe. I hurt for weeks as Moon cat can tell you, I go ouch a lot talking to her on the phone. My lungs are a tipping point you see I was diagnosed with smoker’s lung. I smoked for 25 years and was exposed to my dad’s second hand smoke for 7 years on top of that, back in the 1960 and 1970s there wasn’t the medical evidence about second smoke that we have now. I will have to have cat scans ever six months or so to see if I develop cancer. I write this not for your sympathy, I had some teachable moments in the past few months. Please learn from my mistakes and live a Tobacco Free Life especially if you have a family history of cancer. If you smoke, quit, and if you have to, don’t do it in confided areas around other especially kids. You must be proactive about your and your love ones health. When your prescibe medication find out about the possible side effects. Ask lots of question of your Medical providers. Ask whats the worst case that can happen durring any course of treatment especially if you hear the word "agressive". Ever hear the term "Little Stick". IF your love starts to exhibit a behavior change, or tells you that their see or hearing things after starting any coarse of any medication the get in contact with their Physician and talk directly with their Physician, and express your concern of their behavior change emdiately. Its not all bad, One side effect of the Prednisone is that I total lost my appetite. My stomach shrank and I started eat lowwer carb and fat diet. I lost 18 pounds (8 KG) of fat and now am working on rebuilding my stamina. Mooncat and I have become friends and shes a great person she is smart and has a great heart. I not on this site anymore because I lashed out during on of my delusional episodes and said some very hurtful things I did stupid things over on ISA. I feel ashamed of that, but I have to except that it happened and moved on. I ask you not to judge my actions that happen at worst time in my life but, remember me by the old happy baby avitar. Have a happy and wonderfully life. Title: Re: A friend asked me to post this... Post by: Katie on October 27, 2009, 04:04:13 pm Oh man, that sounds like Brat's been through Hell, send him my love please mooncat!
Title: Re: A friend asked me to post this... Post by: Mooncat on October 27, 2009, 04:14:16 pm Will do, Junior_Firefighter.
Title: Re: A friend asked me to post this... Post by: Katie on October 27, 2009, 04:23:29 pm You can call me Katie, and also, tell Brat that it never occured to me that his/her (sorry, not sure) actions were mean, but I know how medicine can make you, you can just go crazy!
Title: Re: A friend asked me to post this... Post by: Mooncat on October 27, 2009, 04:34:54 pm Trust me Katie, I also know the maddening effects of medicine. I'll definitely give him your love and good thoughts. Brat told me that he was thinking about re-registering here but he didn't want to reopen old wounds.
Title: Re: A friend asked me to post this... Post by: Katie on October 27, 2009, 04:39:49 pm Oh, no I think if people read this they will unerstand, and just get over it. He should definetly re-register, he's sorely missed!
Title: Re: A friend asked me to post this... Post by: Mooncat on October 27, 2009, 04:43:43 pm I'm talking to him later tonight, and I'll let him know what you said.
I've been trying to persuade him to re-register, but he's kinda iffy about it. Title: Re: A friend asked me to post this... Post by: Pierre on October 27, 2009, 05:32:22 pm don't worry i am sure that everyone will welcome him back to the site with open arms 2hug Pierre Title: Re: A friend asked me to post this... Post by: Paden on October 27, 2009, 08:08:51 pm Pierre, don't you dare to presume to speak for everyone because you aren't one of those that got hurt. People will have to make up their own minds as to whether or not to forgive and forget, including staff. You can only speak for yourself, so please do that and that ONLY.
Title: Re: A friend asked me to post this... Post by: Katie on October 27, 2009, 08:22:00 pm I don't know about anyone else, but I'll welcome Brat back. ;)
Title: Re: A friend asked me to post this... Post by: Pierre on October 27, 2009, 08:37:55 pm Pierre, don't you dare to presume to speak for everyone because you aren't one of those that got hurt. People will have to make up their own minds as to whether or not to forgive and forget, including staff. You can only speak for yourself, so please do that and that ONLY. I am sorry paden i was only bieng friendly ;) Title: Re: A friend asked me to post this... Post by: Paden on October 28, 2009, 02:50:41 pm You can welcome him back, that's all well and good, but please keep in mind that some people won't because they were hurt by his words and actions, and in some cases, hurt very deeply. It is the unwise that are unwary. That was one of the first lessons I learned in my life and I live by it today.
Title: Re: A friend asked me to post this... Post by: caffeinated.joy on October 28, 2009, 03:01:12 pm You can be friendly, Pierre. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Just bear in mind no one can presume to speak for anyone but themselves. Brat understood what he did and accepted the consequences voluntarily. It's possible he understands that coming back may open a can of worms best left closed. I'm not trying to be cruel because I do wish Brat well, but Pierre and Junior_Firefighter, it's best you don't speak for people, especially if you don't know the full story.
Title: Re: A friend asked me to post this... Post by: Katie on October 28, 2009, 05:04:44 pm Sorry, I should change that to hope.
Title: Re: A friend asked me to post this... Post by: Pierre on October 28, 2009, 05:09:56 pm sorry joy and thank you i understand ;)
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