Insimenator.org

Simmers' Paradise => Sims Stories => Topic started by: Hidden~Secret on September 13, 2007, 12:52:30 pm



Title: Fairy Months Of The Year Updated 9/13
Post by: Hidden~Secret on September 13, 2007, 12:52:30 pm
(http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb237/PhotoSimTime/snapshot_73e2054f_73e2070b.jpg)
Love was always a thing they had.Jade loved her husband so much.They were newlyweds and loved the thought of they would soon have children.They then three months later found out that they would finally be having a baby.They decided to go to Abhijat Abhay he was their leader...their god.
(http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb237/PhotoSimTime/snapshot_73e2054f_33e2d37a.jpg)
They were so happy and when they reached Abhijat Abhay he told them they would be expecting girls.
"Girls?As in plural?You mean were having more than one?"
"Yes,your family was destined to have more than ten children in one birth.You will be having twelve children and all girls like the twelve months of the year."
"Wait so sir if I may ask whats the catch to have these twelve little baby girls?"
(http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb237/PhotoSimTime/snapshot_73e2054f_73e340e0.jpg)
"Before they are three years old at the age of two you must have them potty-trained and they must be taught to walk.And then...you must give them all away to different orphanage's."
"No...NO!!!!I can't loose my babies.Please please tell me why."
"There is a great evil out there and your children must be safe until they learn how to control their powers and become powerful enough to defeat The Ishwar."

9 Months Later...
(http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb237/PhotoSimTime/snapshot_73e2054f_53e33b2d.jpg)
"My stomach hurts."
"Ok well i'll have one of the midwives come here."

10 minutes later...
"Jade its a false alarm you won't be giving birth for another week or two."
"Ok thanks."

1 Week Later...
(http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb237/PhotoSimTime/snapshot_73e2054f_93e58c04.jpg)
"Hi little baby hi i'm your daddy and you'll be here soon and we'll see you soon."
"Honey I think they are scared just help me to the bed."
"Whats wrong Jade?"
(http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb237/PhotoSimTime/snapshot_73e2054f_b3e3411b.jpg)
"I think i'm going to give birth soon...maybe today just call the midwife and she'll fly down here."
"Ok i'll get her now."

Please Comment I worked hard on this and I hate that many of you just look and don't think about the creators feelings that they feel hurt when no one comments


Title: Fairy Months Of The Year Updated 9/13
Post by: vickylougrl on September 13, 2007, 02:17:28 pm
shining this seems to be a nice beginning to a sweet story.  I'm curious to see Jade pop out 12 babies at once! lol!


Title: Fairy Months Of The Year Updated 9/13
Post by: Hidden~Secret on September 13, 2007, 02:20:56 pm
Quote from: vickylougrl;932720
shining this seems to be a nice beginning to a sweet story.  I'm curious to see Jade pop out 12 babies at once! lol!

Thanks for the comment and yeah it was hard to do since the max of my download only allows me to have four babies at once and I downloaded something to let me have alot of sims in one house so I had to make her pregnant and her husband and I had to make sure to get girls

AND please I check onto here very often if you look at this and don't comment I know your username and i'll just keep my stories to myself and no one will ever see any good stories anymore


Title: Fairy Months Of The Year Updated 9/13
Post by: supersonic. on September 13, 2007, 06:01:01 pm
Interesting...She's very pretty also.
But, it's a bit hard to understand since you gave us no type of prologue.
Continue!


Title: Fairy Months Of The Year Updated 9/13
Post by: vickylougrl on September 13, 2007, 06:16:32 pm
I check the stories on here often.  I'm planning on doing one myself soon but it's still in the planning stage.  My weakness is photos I'm not terribly talented at photoshop so everything I do must be ingame so yeah it's hard.
I also like supersonic would like to see a prologue if you decide to do one and get a little background on your couple before they became one.


Title: Fairy Months Of The Year Updated 9/13
Post by: Hidden~Secret on September 13, 2007, 06:20:57 pm
(http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb237/PhotoSimTime/snapshot_73e2054f_33e33a17.jpg)
Jade used to be a midwife and had been almost killed ten times by the same person who wanted her on his wall...as a trophy or maybe a trophy wife.She was lonely and unhappy until she met John and married him.
(http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb237/PhotoSimTime/snapshot_73e2054f_d3e5dae5.jpg)
John was a lonely man who knew of his powers and after his family banned him from their home since he was different.He soon met Jade and found a new hope in life and a better reason to live.


Title: Fairy Months Of The Year Updated 9/13
Post by: vickylougrl on September 13, 2007, 09:04:40 pm
cool shining would have liked more LOL!  Can I make a suggestion?  How about putting your couple in a rustic setting?  Since they are fantasy beings?  I dunno maybe a rustic old fashioned cabin.  There are some really cool ones around available for download it would add feeling to the story I think but its a good start.


Title: Fairy Months Of The Year Updated 9/13
Post by: Hidden~Secret on September 13, 2007, 09:55:10 pm
oh cool can you recomend some that would go?Oh and I don't want to spoil anything but she gives birth in a forest of trees,rivers and flowers


Title: Fairy Months Of The Year Updated 9/13
Post by: vickylougrl on September 14, 2007, 07:35:42 am
How about an elven home?  Do a search on the exchange I know I saw some there.


Title: Fairy Months Of The Year Updated 9/13
Post by: Sam the T-man on September 14, 2007, 09:25:56 am
Not bad, but if I'm honest it seems lacking on the story part especially. The concept's good, but there's no feeling - language is the writer's paint (read that in tips somewhere :)); there may be pictures but you still need to be more descriptive. There's also not much character development going on - why should we care about the characters? What makes them special? What background history do they have? You've posted about the latter I know, but we need to know more - where are they from? Why are they in the situation they're in now? Who are these gods and why would their children be in danger? In doing this keep going back to why we should care - that's a crucial part of capturing the reader's interest and pulling them into the story. You can do a search on Google for creative writing tips, also there's threads here (http://forums.sims2community.com/forumdisplay.php?f=16) you can look through.

Also, if this is meant to be a fantasy story, you'll need to make us believe that. Not only the rustic buildings, but you need to work on the clothes. There's lots of sites out there that offer fantasy style clothes (although it doesn't seem that way (experience talking)). If you're using desert terrain, install this (http://www.modthesims2.com/showthread.php?t=219613) to get rid of the modern asphalt roads, look around on MTS2 for invisible recolours of the dustbin and mailbox. Search for appliances etc. that would look the part. Also, check the thread here on contest central about taking pictures, there's loads of tips available (I notice there's a wall down on one pic, for instance, watch out for that).

There's a lot there I know, but just trying to help as a fellow writer (as well as someone else who feels disheartened through lack of replies). I'm still learning too ;)


Title: Fairy Months Of The Year Updated 9/13
Post by: vickylougrl on September 14, 2007, 01:12:45 pm
shining Sadie's tips are good and will boost your story loads.  I'm working on a story I want to post also.  So I am reading everyones stories not only to entertain myself but to see what makes them good or what makes them flat.  Stories that make you love or hate a character connect with readers.  

For example you could once you get your set done as in appropriate background you should show them meeting with the god/ruler who is demanding they give up their babies.
You might also show the actual babies and their different destinies or at least a glimpse of it to hook your readers.  Just suggestions to make the readers more interested.


Title: Fairy Months Of The Year Updated 9/13
Post by: Hidden~Secret on September 15, 2007, 05:58:25 pm
to everyone who helped with tips I say-Thank you!I will have the next chapter up soon a long one if I might add.


Title: Fairy Months Of The Year Updated 9/13
Post by: Sam the T-man on September 15, 2007, 06:03:27 pm
You're very welcome :)

Something else that just occurred to me - deserts are pretty devoid of forests, wouldn't it make more sense to use a temperate terrain (and use a replacement on MTS2)?


Title: Fairy Months Of The Year Updated 9/13
Post by: Hidden~Secret on September 15, 2007, 06:20:52 pm
hum...I really wasn't thinking about that when I made them but when I created them I didn't have the intention of making them part of the story


Title: Fairy Months Of The Year Updated 9/13
Post by: vickylougrl on September 15, 2007, 07:38:43 pm
shining since you going to move Jade and her hubby I found a bunch of cool links for you if you decide you want to load up your download folder to it's max like I been doing lately! LOL!  Here ya go.

http://www.sims2wiki.info/wiki.php?title=Content_List:Fantasy


Title: Fairy Months Of The Year Updated 9/13
Post by: Hidden~Secret on September 15, 2007, 07:49:09 pm
lol I know and thanks that link is very useful I have like 7,300 downloads


SimplePortal 2.1.1