A Safe Haven => General Discussion => Topic started by: Glamily on September 28, 2009, 08:10:04 am

Title: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Glamily on September 28, 2009, 08:10:04 am
My whole family has either ADD, ADHD, Asbergus or are just quirky.
I know that if I was in a normal school, I'd be called ADD.

But I'm just curious as to how many people there are on here that have ADD, ADHD, Asbergus or something like that.
I wanna know what your quirks are if you have any.

Mine are that I don't like being around people, I cannot stand quiet, I'm incredibly bright in maths, I have to have something to fiddle with.. And a whole heap of other things.

Please tell me your experiences/quirks with/from ADD, ADHD, Asbergus and so on.

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: SenkoTwiik on September 28, 2009, 10:56:08 am
I'm not, but my sister-in-law has it. She isn't all hyper, running around like people on tv that have it. It's just hard for her to concentrate on a lot of things. She can sit still for long periods of time, but she says so many things go through her mind at one time that it's hard to push everything away and focus. She likes to keep her hands busy with drawing or painting as a hobby. She's un-medicated.

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Glamily on September 28, 2009, 06:43:15 pm
I'm also un-medicated. My brother is on medication, because if he goes off it he gets really cranky and does stupid things like jumping off buildings and so on.
My father is on medication, because otherwise he does run around like the people on tv, and can't concerntrate.
Me, my brother and my father, all have a furious temper, which gets worse when they get off their pills.

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: SenkoTwiik on September 28, 2009, 07:23:47 pm
When you look at my sister-in-law trying to figure something out, you can honestly see that she's thinking and the wheels in her head are turning. You can also almost pinpoint the time where she loses her train of thought and has to try concentrating all over again. Also if you're talking to her about one thing and someone quickly changes the subject, she will stay stuck on the previous subject and yell at people when they confuse her...then she gets really embarassed when she realizes she has missed like 10 minutes of the conversation.

My uncle and aunt said that their son had ADHD...but he really didn't. They were totally crappy parents that didn't want to let little boys be little boys. Just because he liked to run around and play, and they didn't follow through with telling him to calm down, they said it was ADHD. They didn't help him with his homework when he was little, and when he didn't stick to doing it, they refused to admit fault, and just insisted it was his ADHD. Yet they would give him his medication with Dr. Pepper, and let him eat sugar packets...and they wondered why he was so active.

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: soulofthesea on September 28, 2009, 08:02:32 pm
that's pretty dumb there, Jamie. I hate it when people automatically assume that meds will make an ADD/ADHD sufferer smarter, with less homework help. and when they don't succeed, they get mad and blame the kids and their disability. what really gets on my nerves is that when parents find out that their kid has a learning disability, they just disown the kid and try to get away with abuse and neglect just because their kid is "special".

to be honest, I'm not sure what the hell my mental state is! I've been getting weird self-diagnosises from my friends and family: borderline autism, depression, schizophrenia, Asperger's Syndrome, Obsessive Complusive Disorder (obsessive, maybe. compulsive? no way! I mean, don't repeatedly wash my hands and all that junk...where was I?), kelptomania, multiple personalities, ADD, low self-esteem, etc. you name it, I'll bet you one of my family members or friends diagnosed me with it. and the thing is, I repeatedly deny that I have any of the listed disabilities...well, I can agree on the low self-esteem stuff, though. :rolleyes:

my parents don't think I have ADD, but I have to admit, it has been a lot harder for me to concentrate recently, especially around the middle of the spring semester last year. my mind has a really bad tendancy to wander around and I can hardly get anything in on what the teacher's say. and strangely, I still pass most of those classes. :confused: then again, school might have a lot to do with my mentality. I mean, I was fine all summer and during weekends, but when it's a school day or event, my mood sinks every single time, especially during English, which is why I'm dropping that advanced class.

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Glamily on September 28, 2009, 09:50:43 pm
I have the same thing Soul.
I reckon if I was ever diagnosed, I'd probably be taking a pill martini every day and night.
I find that even if I don't pay attention, I can still recall whatever the people around me were saying or doing (which is excellent for when you get in trouble)

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Care on October 12, 2009, 10:07:08 pm
My oldest son has ADD/ODD and Schizoaffective Disorder. It get's kind of scary when he is off his meds, and my second middle has Autism.

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Glamily on October 12, 2009, 11:02:59 pm
Its gotta be hard being a mother of some one with Autism and things like that. I know it was hard with mum. The amount of bruises and cuts she got from my brother when he would go off his nut.

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Care on October 12, 2009, 11:55:05 pm
My son isn't hard to take care of at all he is in the middle spectrum of Autism and fairly normal. He is sweet and loving he can talk read and write. He needs no medications He for the most part has actually pulled out of it. My hardest is my oldest with the ADD/ODD and Schizoaffective Disorder. He hears voices and see's things that are not there. He gets delusional and has a big problem with authority figures. And when he is un medicated it is so hard which now that he is 18 and off his meds its really hard..

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Glamily on October 13, 2009, 02:46:53 am
Yeah.. my brother could read, talk and write and everything.. He actually left home at the age of 13.. but we won't go into that.

What is ODD?

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Care on October 13, 2009, 11:59:28 am
Oppositional Defiant Disorder

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Katie on October 13, 2009, 03:43:11 pm
I have ADD, and I have the WORST intention span.... I am always doodling in class so that I don't totally ignore any lessons....

my teachers always yell at me for it, and say I'm lyinh when I tell them I have ADD..... my cousins all have it too, so we are all impatient, hyper jumpy kids when we get together!

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Katie on October 27, 2009, 03:34:00 pm
Just found out I have ADD, severe ADHD, and OCD... man is that a combination or what!?

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Glamily on October 27, 2009, 05:44:09 pm
Blimey..  1hugs

I know what you mean though with your attention span. Mum is always telling me off for not focusing on my school work and the teachers have to call my name about three times because I don't listen and I'm always day-dreaming.

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Katie on October 27, 2009, 07:02:21 pm
Oi, a few days ago in history we had to watch this educational movie  :rolleyes:

Anyway, I was drawing the whole time, and finally the teacher came over and asked me to stop. After class I went up to him and tols him this. "I have OCD, ADD, and really bad ADHD, if I try to pay attention I will forget what is going on. I honestly have to be doing something else or I will forget, and not learn anything. So if you mark me down I will transfer classes."

Then he listened. :D

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Faylen on December 26, 2009, 09:00:22 pm
I've had ADHD my entire life, and I was diagnosed back before they called it ADHD.  Having OCD or ODD or BDD or depression along with it is more common than having ADHD alone.  I'm unmedicated right now, but if I could find a doctor on my insurance plan that would give me back my meds, I'd jump for joy.  Once you know what it's like to be able to think of one thing at a time, it's hard to go back to having a brain that's always full of noise.

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: lambsie on January 07, 2010, 01:38:18 am
My son has AD/HD. My husband and I questioned our decision to medicate until one day a few weeks after he began his medication he came up to me and gave me a huge hug. when I asked him what was it for he said "thank you. My heart doesn't feel like its breaking all the time anymore" he was 7 1/2 years old. My heart nearly broke that day when I realised how much pain he had been in, and I have never questioned our decision since.

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Mousegirl on January 08, 2010, 10:45:29 am
I have ADHD. I love it at times [it's what I mostly contribute to my inormase imagination, could be wrong, but meh] but it's a pain in the butt when your in school and you just want to look out the window, or draw and you force yourself to pay attention. I was diagnosed when I was about....5? I donno But it's amusing...early in the mornings my friends [and some random people] always ask how I can be so awake/hyper, I just grin at them :)

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Faylen on January 11, 2010, 02:37:08 pm
Actually, that is one of the good things about ADHD.  Your brain is always making connections - other people might think that you're talking nothing but non-sequiturs all the time, but the truth is that you've done a six degrees of separation type game in your head in a fraction of a second.  It allows you, depending on where you are in the spectrum, and how curious and creative you are, to see relationships among superficially unrelated things.  You can remember bits of information that stay hidden until something you see or hear reminds you of it, and it makes you a fascinating party guest.  You might learn things better if you understand how to apply them or how they came to be.  If something catches your interest, you can become better informed about it than most of the people around you in record time (just be careful - some interests aren't going to grease the social wheels!)

The bad thing is that if something doesn't interest you, it's nearly impossible to pay attention.  If something you need to know is presented to you and you can't figure out why you need to know it, or how you'll put it to use, or how it's connected to something important, it might not ever stick in your head, no matter how hard you try to remember it.  The older you get, and the more you've learned or experienced, the more difficult it is to stay focused, because everything reminds you of something interesting and sets you off on a new project or a mental reverie.  If you see something interesting and think "Hey, I could make that," or "I think I could figure out how to do that," or "I wonder if I could use that for something else," then your ADHD can take control, and you end up surrounded by mental and physical junk.  You start things to see if you can do them.  Once you can, you might never do them again - or finish them in the first place.  If you find you can't, you waste tons of time trying to figure out why not, and how you could fix it.  And you don't throw anything out because you might get back to it.  Then you're surrounded with mementos of your failure (which reinforces what all the grownups in your life told you about how you wouldn't be a failure if you only tried harder!) 

It's very hard to edit your life, but it's key to look around you.  If you have unfinished projects around you, finish them, throw them away (yes, that's REALLY hard if you have it) or pay someone else to finish them.  Do this before you allow yourself to start anything else, especially anything else of a similar nature.  Winnow down your possessions until you can see everything you own just by looking around.  Don't put things in boxes or closets (or boxes in closets!) to save for later.  Use your storage space vertically rather than horizontally - don't stack things two and three deep.  Do I do all of these?  Well, I try.  Some things still need a LOT of work, but when I've taken my own advice, I've found it a lot easier to stay on track.  I've hoarded one thing or another all my life, and I've been working on throwing away or giving away for several years now, and most of my house and my life are in minimal states of chaos!

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Xordaii on January 11, 2010, 03:24:57 pm
I cannot stand quiet, I'm incredibly bright in maths, I have to have something to fiddle with
This is classic. It is called sensory issues.  At any one time, they can change to something else, or appear with others. My son and I both hate socks unless they are inside out, he hates loud noises, my daughter won't eat certain foods, and loves having music to drown out conversation.  She used to take a Chinese Jump Rope to school to fiddle with.  The math thing? 90% of people with Asperger's Syndrome are genius or above.  There isn't a single case found of someone with AS who is not average or above.  My kids find it funny knowing that, and someone used the RTD word on them.

hard for her to concentrate on a lot of many things go through her mind at one time
another classic AS symptom.  I have the hard to concentrate part, and my daughter and I both describe AS as a funnel, or the output queue from a keyboard:  lots of things go in, but your mind processes them one at a time.  While, eventually, everything will get processed, it takes longer than for everyone else to get to something you experienced and react. This is shown when someone says "Hi" when you are busy, music is going, and someone else is talking to you at the same time.  Eventually, you will pause, realize they said something, and say "Oh, sorry, hi!"  For my daughter, that is about 5 minutes later. :D  It also means you should only give someone with ADD/AS/Autism one or two things to do at a time, one step at a time.  I can't tell my son to get ready for school, I have to tell him to go get dressed, then breakfast when he gets done, then get your backpack/coat.  He gets lost or frustrated otherwise.

she will stay stuck on the previous subject and yell at people when they confuse her...then she gets really embarassed when she realizes she has missed like 10 minutes of the conversation
This is me too! I can tell you why she does that:  I have short term memory problems.  5 second attention span, literally :(  If I let someone change the subject, whatever I wanted to say, and most of the time, what I needed to tell them will NOT be remembered, and I may never think of it again.  I don't yell, but I do get upset at forgetting what I needed to tell someone.  That 5 second attention span? Doesn't affect my attention span, like ADD would, but it does make it hard to read something, or concentrate on a conversation... I will reread some paragraphs 10 times because I forgot what I read half way through a sentence! Try explaining to a college professor why you need accommodations (and have a letter from the disabilities office saying he has to comply) when you have a high IQ.  I have had professors tell me I was too smart to need help, even when all I wanted was to record lectures for taking notes later.

My uncle and aunt said that their son had ADHD
I agree Jamie.  That is bad parenting.  We pretty much acknowledge that I may have AS, my daughter has been diagnosed same, and my son medical Autism.  Yet, I have never medicated them or myself, and when met, both of my children have now, with lots of help at home and school, progessed to the point where you can't TELL.  Except when you grab physically my son, but really, who doesn't get mad at being grabbed?

one a six degrees of separation type game in your head in a fraction of a second...edit your life
Wow. Faylen, are you a FlyBaby?  I ask because I am :D  I have to do the organize/toss edit for everything I keep, or I would be drowning in Chaos at home.  Your description was very spot on.  I find we all tend to do it here, and someone says Huh?  Then you find yourself explaining that you said something in your head, but your mouth decided that only the first and last part were important to relate, and you end up with something like "I went to the doctor and brought home puppies" when you were thinking "I went to the doctor appointment today, stopped at the grocers on the way home, someone was giving away puppies, I have two kids, and bought 2 for them."  I get strange looks! :D

I don't find it hard to be a mother of Autistic Spectrum kids, nor to mind the cousins who happen to have other disabilities.  I do find parent training helpful, however, if your state happens to have a Parent Education Ass, look them up or ask the school if your district has one.  The best class I ever took was one comparing Autism and AS.  I have spent loads of time around kids of all ages, normal and not since I was a teen babysitting, and I was eldest of a total of 6 kids.  I have to say, kids on the Autism spectrum tend to be sweet enjoyable, lovable kids if treated kindly and correctly.  They have one problem: dealing with things other kids can brush off, like violence.  Some things you just can't do, and expect the kid to handle.  What I have learned is that anything you have to do to make allowances for our kids, actually makes "any" kid learn better/behave better.  And I find it funny that other moms welcome my son to visit, because he hates it when rules are broken.  They think it is great that he kind of rejects any suggestions to misbehave when Mom isn't looking.  I just hope the potty mouth phase goes out soon.  He just hit middle school, and that is about all he does to rebel.  I am ex-Army, and sometimes it gets on even my nerves.

Edit: Don't want you to think it has all been fun and games, it does take longer for our kids to mature/reach stages than other kids.  Middle school has been about when they hit their strides academically.  My son has always had half the vocabulary other kids had (and made very funny combos from it to say the same things other kids have words for.)  My daughter has struggled socially.  After years of in school social stories, coaching, and lots of patient help, she got nominated this week for student of the month for the school. Both kids are straight A's this year (which is kind of neat, seeing how hard it was last year for them, and how far they have come.)  At one point she was bullied so badly I had to pull her out of public school for a year.  Two moves later, and we are pretty relieved that it is easier now that they are older, and that we have found a school that balances making allowances with not excusing everything because of a "syndrome".

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: SenkoTwiik on January 11, 2010, 04:54:02 pm
You know what's weird that I have heard from a couple people that claim to have ADD? Some of them smoke weed and use their ADD as an excuse. They say stuff like, "I need to smoke weed because it helps me consentrate." Personally, I have watched them, and no it doesn't. They are always even farther away while under the influence and it's even harder to get their attention to focus. What do you guys think of that? If it doesn't work, why do people use the excuse?

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Xordaii on January 12, 2010, 10:57:33 am
Same reason anyone does drugs.  They like it.  Sophistry is the art of using "reason" and logic to justify your own actions, when you know it is wrong.

Sort of like some of my smoking friends with asthma. I have asthma, I know how hard it is to breath, and so do they. But why do they smoke? Because it "warms the lungs" in winter.  Maybe, but it sure isn't going to make it easier to breath.

Don't want to get into a discussion on marijauna here:  That is another discussion and I don't want to derail this one.  The comment was on specifically the excuse "it is for my ADD."

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: kinnika on January 12, 2010, 11:22:59 am
Oh, man... this list could go on forever...

I don't have A.D.D (if I did, it would be very slight) and I certainly don't have A.D.H.D, but I definitely have some weird quirks I have accepted as some things I was just born with.

1) If there is something I could trip on, fall in, or walk into, it'll find me like a magnet to metal. I am the one of the klutziest people in the world. Facing high school gym was like having to go get a root canal.

2) If I am focusing on two things at once, I will put something in the completely wrong place (ex: keys in the freezer, milk in the cupboard), so I always check the wackiest place first when looking for something.

3) I have a tendency to have not hear something when spoken to when I have at least two other thoughts in my head at the same time.

4) I always have to be multitasking to some sort of media. If I'm working on a paper, my work, or anything else, I have to also have a movie or some CD in at the same time. Quiet gets me nowhere and stops my mental hamster from running on its wheel.

5) If I don't have my coffee in the morning or my sweets in the afternoons, I start to turn homicidal. - Hey, I don't smoke anymore, I need something!

6) I hate it when people eat my leftovers without asking.

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Xordaii on January 12, 2010, 11:54:14 am
Oh man! yeah, I understand that. I have put books in the freezer trying to make dinner while reading, and someone distracts me with a question.  Ever put ramen in the microwave, get distracted, and forget to put the water in, but you start it?  Horrible smell.  I have done it at least twice as an adult.  We love to cook, but when you do something silly like that, or put salt in the cookies instead of sugar (my husband and daughter did that one) it makes you feel silly.

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Faylen on January 12, 2010, 01:16:52 pm
Heh.  I tried Flylady, but couldn't keep up with her system.  I had to take a few hints, try them at home, and see what worked.

One big difference between ADHD people and AS people you'll see in conversation.  If the ADHD person is telling you about something and you interrupt or add something, the conversation will take off in a different direction.  The ADHD person will lie awake all that night because that's when he/she finally remembers the point he/she wanted to make in the first place.  An AS person will continually turn the subject back to what he/she wanted to talk about in the first place, and if you interrupt or try to change the topic, he/she will try to reintroduce it.  Depending on the type and severity of the AS, you might not even notice that you're back where you started, or you'll get annoyed at how blatantly your attempt to turn away from that subject was ignored.  The AS person will very likely not know or care that you're not interested in that subject.

Both types have sensory issues.  Anything from fidgeting to self-harm will be used to focus or shut out extra stimulation.  Things that don't bother other people are intolerable, as far as noise, sounds, smells, lights and colors, and touch.  While someone neurotypical might merely be annoyed at an itchy label in clothing or a wrinkle in the sheets, an ADHD or AS person won't be able to think of anything else, and won't be able to function as long as that stimulus is there.  Forget pulling the curtains to block out light so you can sleep - the fact that that light is coming in your window at the very time you want to be sleeping is irritating enough to keep you awake.  I used to put on music when I was doing homework, but the way it helped me was by giving me something that I could use my focus on the homework to deliberately block out.  Ugh.

As far as marijuana for ADHD - that is so lame.  It's a depressant.  It makes it worse.  If you have ADHD and you use a depressant, you get all wired and hyper, and lose focus even more.  You remember all the talk about parents complaining about their kids being woozy from Ritalin?  That's because if you have ADHD, and you get enough stimulation from a medication, you don't need to DO anything to stimulate your brain.  So nothing is exciting enough for you to bother staying awake for.  I get my best naps EVAR on Adderall.

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Xordaii on January 12, 2010, 01:59:53 pm
The turning the conversation back to what they want to talk about can be AS, but a lot of the time, it is simply a symptom of another common trait to autistic disorders:  problems figuring out social cues.

One of the first things we figured out our children had problems with (and I remember having too) was how other people feel.  Luckily, this is one of the things easily taught, and easily grown out of before adulthood.

You know how, if talking to someone, they start glancing at their watch, looking away from you over and over, saying things like "that's nice," and kind of not paying attention, you know they are in a hurry? Or at least late for something, because they look at a clock?  Or how about when you get right up in someone's space, and they kind of back off a few inches?  You realize you got to close and back off yourself.  They are uncomforable.

Autistic problems with social cues stem from the inability to pick it up as you mature.  Other people pick up that a smile means happy, a glare means anger, they also speak body language because they picked it up as they grew.  I remember having to be taught facial expressions and getting lectures on subjects involving having more empathy.  Kids with autistic disorders have problems picking it up on their own, and figuring out how others feel in situations (empathy, or how would I feel if I were in your shoes.)  Sounds odd doesn't it, when you think how sweet most kids with Autism actually are, especially to family?  It isn't that they are mean, it is that they have to figure out what causes feelings, how it feels in some situations, and how to express it.  Once he figured out some of it, everyone started commenting how my son is the first one to help others now if someone gets hurt.

Sometimes it helps to tell the person straight out you don't want to talk about something anymore.  It may be that they don't know you don't really care for it, or it makes you uncomfortable.  On the other hand, true straight up Autism and AS both have focused interests as a problem. The dude who knew every single detail about the twin towers before 911 comes to mind. No idea what happened to him with 911 happening, but before that he was famous for knowing how many days it took to build, and having memorized the schematics and floor plans.  He could tell you who put in the windows on what floor.  Again, he just didn't realize everyone else wasn't as interested as he was in it.

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: idontcare on August 04, 2010, 02:05:51 am
My mom has ADD. She takes medicine for it but she still finds it difficult to focus. It was probly what helped her room to get unbelievably messy. I usually tell her all the things she needs to do and that helps.

I have OCD. I haven't been diagnosed with it but I know without a doubt that I have it. I suppose there is a slight positive to it but lately it's been ridiculously annoying so much that I just want to scream. When I get frustrated, it is noticeable making me more frustrated. I don't care about the slight positive anymore..right now I'm at the point where I just want to get rid of it and I don't know how. I can't go to a doctor because I don't have the money/insurance.

A random quirk of mine would be a pet peeve. If I see sleep in someone (this includes animals)'s eyes I absolutely have to wipe it away. Our last dog would constantly have sleep in her eyes and I'd go insane because she'd be feisty when I was trying to wipe it away.
God forbid if I ever saw my celeb hunks with sleep in their eyes..then what would I do? I couldn't wipe it away since it would most likely just be a picture/video.

Idk if this is that quirky but I would imagine most people get in a bad mood when they're sleepy or women on their time. Not me, I can't recall one time I got in a bad mood for these two things..not even when I was little. When I get sleepy, I'm always more giggly or clumsy. Don't talk to me when I have a bad enough headache though, I will rip your head off.

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: Paden on August 04, 2010, 11:02:25 am
You know, if you think you have such a thing, you need to seek the help of someone trained to make that diagnosis and not assign it to yourself. Self-diagnosis is never helpful and in fact, often does more harm than good. I've know several documented OCD people and they rarely, if ever, settle for anything that is less than their idea of perfection on something. Be it washed hands, a clean room/living space, or a written/typed document, they don't and in fact cannot rest until it is absolutely perfect.

Title: Re: ADD? ADHD?
Post by: idontcare on August 04, 2010, 03:19:43 pm
You know, if you think you have such a thing, you need to seek the help of someone trained to make that diagnosis and not assign it to yourself. Self-diagnosis is never helpful and in fact, often does more harm than good. I've know several documented OCD people and they rarely, if ever, settle for anything that is less than their idea of perfection on something. Be it washed hands, a clean room/living space, or a written/typed document, they don't and in fact cannot rest until it is absolutely perfect.

Well you know like I said I don't have the money for a doctor.

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