Venting, Venting and More Venting.

[caffeinated.joy]

I've had a couple of messages asking for this, so...here you go.

We have a spam thread to fill with nonsense chatter, a thread for posting important news and events, but nowhere to just get what's bugging you off your chest. Is it too cold? Too hot? Do mean people suck? Does your chewing gum lose it's flavour on the bedpost overnight? Rant away!

Before you do, I would like you all to keep a few things in mind:

Keep it PG-13: Watch your language and remember: if you wouldn't want your child to see it here, don't post it here.
Respect: What might not be a major problem to you may be huge to someone else. Please remember this when posting replies. We can't all like one another, but we can show respect.

This is not a thread to use as an excuse to abuse others. Bullying, flaming, trolling and abuse of any kind will not be tolerated.

[Yazoo]

Sweet, I am the first one to write in this. My rant or vent, is this.

I am sick of people making fun of me, to the lack of my English. I may look like I am writing perfect English, but I am not. I have to use a translator to do so. I need to have an English teacher to read me English books in Hungarian.

Not dissing on Americans, I swear. But I lived in America for a few months, when I was in High School, foreign exchange student program. I was made fun of, because no matter what I did, I would always speak a little bit of English then right into Hungarian. My teacher tried learning Hungarian to help me. And I still thank her, for doing so.

Not only was I bullied with my lack of English. But I was also bullied because I am gay.

I honestly, dislike hateful racist bastards ((excuse my language)). But it hurts, when I try to explain what I am asking, and people still tell me it frustrates them because they can't understand what I am writing, some people will call me out in front of EVERYONE, and make me feel like a moron.

Believe me, it sucks, to be the one that has to have my own mother-in-law, who is Japanese, to help me. She knows better English than I do. So I am always asking her for help, and that includes my wife as well. Though she can't follow tutorials, she speaks, and writes better English than I do. So, it does suck that I am called out for my spelling errors or my lack of grammar

But yeah. Thats it.

[mookie]

@ Levera , your English writing , no matter how you come about it ( personally , with help , using a translator) is more than fine. I'm envious and admire you , I wish I could communicate in any language other than English half as well as you do. Anyone that says otherwise is either nitpicking , having a bad day , projecting their own foul mood or has other issues. I'm somewhat familiar with your writing from MTS ( if this is the name you used to go by on there , before you changed it) , where I have a similar username to mine here , just all caps and with a last name added on. I always enjoy your posts , you have a fun attitude and are always wanting to learn more about the Sims game. Being fun/happy and wanting to learn things are traits that more simmers , or people in general, should have , you rock!   

If the majority of the simming world spoke Hungarian , or any other language , and the forums were conducted in that language , I think my post count for all the forums combined would be 0 . I can't begin to imagine how frustrated I would be at wanting help , answers or information about a game I loved and having to work very hard to get that information and risk ridicule because of it.

A few years back my old computer died and I had to try to replace all the cc that I really loved , that I'd lost. One of the things was a deco boxing ring made by FeeEssen that had disappeared from her site. I used google translate to send her a request in German for help finding it again. She was so kind and helpful and sent it to me by E mail. I showed a friend of mine , that speaks German fluently , my request to her and he had a few really good laughs at how certain things translated.  That's just the way those things work , anyone reading one of those translated texts should have the good grace and common sense to laugh with you , not at you , as I was fortunate enough to experience.

I admire your effort and desire , please don't let the negativity of others diminish those qualities. Happy simming!

[Yazoo]

@mookie: Thank you for you kind words, it means a lot to me. You have no clue, how much it means to me. Sometimes my English with my friends, I will say things that I do not mean. Its really sad. But they are understanding. And my friends and I will go back speaking Hungarian instead of speaking English. Hungarian we all agree on

Mookie, thank you so much for your kind words, and yeah, Hungarian is a hard language to learn, but for Native speakers, we are outgoing about it. Well, at least my friends and I are. We try to help the best way we can

[caffeinated.joy]

Well said, mookie. I couldn't have done better myself.

Levera, however you make yourself understood, you're doing a good job. English certainly isn't an easy language to master. We have so many different ways to say the same thing (big, large, sizable, etc)  and many words spelled the same but pronounced differently and meaning different things. (As in "tear", to pull something apart and "tear", the salty liquid that comes out of your eyes when you're upset). Add to it the words pronounced the same but spelled differently ("pare" - to peel or whittle something, "pair", two of the same thing; a pair of shoes and "pear", the fruit. I'm a native English speaker and find myself confused at my own language. LOL.

Be proud of the effort you make and the steps you're taking to learn. I've tried to learn a different language a few times and failed miserably. You would think I would be able to speak French, since I live in a country with two official languages, English and French, but the best I can do is read it. I don't speak it well at all.

I'm the same way with Spanish, to a lesser degree, and at my last job I had to translate several geological essays and legal documents sent to us from South America. Let me tell you, it just about shredded the frail remainders of my sanity, because legal speak in Spanish and Geological speak in Spanish are almost their own separate languages. In my own way, I completely understand what you go through. Try not to let the people who give you such a hard time diminish your accomplishment.

[Yazoo]

Thank you, Joy for your kind words. I can speak several languages fluently, just not English. I can speak: Hungarian, Romanian, Russian, French, and Japanese. Romanian I learned, I have family there. Japanese for my wife, obviously. Russian because my mum said so, and same with French. >.>

But English, I have not a clue why I can't get it. The hardest language is Japanese followed by Chinese, then English. I learned the hardest language ever. And yet, the third hardest..I just can't do


VENT TIME:

So, my sister-in-law, Hitomi came over at like nearly 3 in morning where I am at. And she was bruised up. And we found out that her husband has been hitting her. I think that is what ticks me off the most, is people that hurt others. Whether it is emotional or physical, its not right. It is so sad, that even in marriages, there are bullies. When will the abuse end? When will people understand that hurting others, will just hurt them in the long run? Its so fricking stupid, I swear.

[caffeinated.joy]

I've spoken to a number of ESL individuals and they've all told me the same thing; one of the reasons English is so hard to learn is all the irregular verb conjugations, and other similar oddities. For example, the past tense of glance is "glanced" and for look it's "looked", but for buy it is "bought" and the past tense of sell is "sold". You would think it would be "buyed" and "selled", but it isn't.  We also don't have a case system to tell you who is doing what to whom. You have to look at the word order. Now, as if these things don't make it hard enough, English doesn't have any system to tell you what kind of word a word is. As you know, all verbs in Japanese (a language I started to learn successfully but lost most of because I didn't use it) have a similar ending (haberu, ageru, daku, etc) . It's the same in Spanish (acceptar, dar, volar, etc).  Not so, English (attend, give, fly). The only exception to this rule of random verb ending is in our adverbs, which mostly end in -ly. Mostly. Always, less, more, too, often and never don't end in -ly. So, English is just one great big pain in the backside.

I could go on, but then you would probably get bored of my nerdish rambling about grammar and fall asleep.

I'm sorry to hear about your sister-in-law. It's hard to watch someone you love go through something so horrible and be helpless to do anything. You can try to convince her to leave, but it's her choice to do so, and the only thing you can do is be there when she needs it. I hope she realizes her situation isn't going to get any better unless she leaves. I really do. My older sister was in an abusive relationship with her husband for years and the day she finally left him was the happiest of my life.

[Theraven]

Levera, learning English is not easy. I had English lessons since elementary school, and still felt totally out of it in 9th/10th grade, even if my grades were alright. It's one thing to learn the language through textbooks that only cover the basic stuff (much easier, but not very useful) - but to grasp the language as a whole is much more difficult. I've got the advantage of my own language not being too far off from English, and I mostly have a good head for grammar, but it's still a tricky language.

My tricks: I read a lot of English books, and now I read as fluently as if I read in my own language. Sure, I sometimes stumble over difficult words I've not seen before, but usually I can put it into context and find a usable meaning for it. I also write a lot in English. If anyone reads through my stories, I'm pretty sure my progression through 5-6 years stands out very clear. I also watch English series without texting, which is very helpful. Not only do I get the nuances in the spoken language, but I also get the pronounciation of the words.

But ask me to talk in English, and I still feel as green as back long ago. It's the one thing I really need to practice. Although it did help when we had an English-speaking English teacher for a year or so. It feels much more natural when everything during the lesson is done in English.

But I have to say that you (with or without a translator?) write very good. Some people - even English-speaking people - write as if they've never had a grammar lesson in their entire life, let alone know what punctuation is.

[Yazoo]

@Theraven: Thank you, for your words. I try to write as best as I can. Sometimes, I wonder if what I am saying is right. Or if what I am saying is completely wrong of what I mean. I look at what I write, and sometimes I feel low about myself, because I think it was wrong.

I get told so many times, that they are frustrated with me. But I do not think they know how hard it is to keep up with English. With all of the 'here' or 'there'. Why can't it be easier?! I mean seriously...With all of those different spellings and meanings...It irritates me.

@Joy: Thanks again, for your words. And as for Hitomi ((Ichigo's sister)), she is staying with us. And she id divorcing him. It took us a good ten hours to tell her to walk away, but we did it. So, now, our house is beyond packed. We have her parents, they decided to stay longer. Ichigo, Hitomi and one my friends, and then me. So, yeah, its packed, and sometimes its hard to get around each other >.<

But I am just happy that Hitomi got out when she could.

But thank you, Joy and Theraven, your words mean a lot to me

[caffeinated.joy]

Of course, the fact there is no word in the English language that is truly English might have something to do with its how messed up it is. If you look at any given word, you'll find it's root is German, French, Spanish, Gaelic or any other language. It's not truly English. It's a mangled form of a word we borrowed from someone else. LOL.

I'm glad Hitomi is with you now. Let's hope she follows through on her decision to divorce.

 

[Yazoo]

That...Is uh sad, actually. Lol. I never knew that, I have learned something today. And in this, I am happy. I guess...English will be one of those languages I will never ever understand, no matter how much I tried.

And she is. At least, I hope. I do not want to see my sister-in-law hurt. After all she is family...Or am I family to them? .-. I don't know, lol. But I am glad that she can actually sleep, without wanting to scream out in pain. She told that to Ichigo and I...And I cried.

[baileybop]

I always thought that it was a courtesy to give your employer the standard two weeks notice  when you are quitting your job. Apparently it's not necessary any longer.....at least not in the trucking industry. My husband got tired of staying home more than he was working so he went out and found a new job, still in the trucking industry, but not in the tanker end of it. I typed up a very nice and respectful letter of resignation for him to give to his boss. His last day was supposed to be on Feb 8th. He took the letter into his boss on Jan 24. All seemed well, he left for a run and got back home on Saturday morning. On Monday he went into work for his usual run and was told that it had been put off and since there was no work, if he wanted to start his new job early, he could do so. So he went back outside and began to clean out his truck.....and then another driver comes into the yard. Hubby goes over to him and says hi and asks where this driver is going......yeah, that run that was supposedly put off, this driver was taking it. He felt really bad, but he needs the work.
Fortunately my hubby's new employer was more than pleased to have my hubby start sooner, but still it took a few days to get everything set up, and find him a run to take. Basically by lying about his usual run, his old employer has cost him one full weeks worth of work, which is obviously going to affect his final pay cheque.
Luckily for us, this will not affect our budget in a negative way. But it was still a really rotten way to treat my husband. Another trucker had also given his notice and his last day was supposed to be on the first of Feb.....his run on Monday (Jan 28) was also supposedly cancelled......
This company (the old one) had more than half the fleet sitting in the yard because they didn't have enough work for their company drivers and when the drivers look for a new job they get shafted. We may only have 4 years left on our mortgage, but we still have to make the payments and we can't do that when he is at home all the time. I guess in today's economy this is an acceptable way to treat your employees, but it's still very sad.

[Paden]

My vent today is that I'm going for my first eye appointment in ten years or more and I'm not sure what to expect. To say that my sight is draining faster than a glass of water in a dust storm is putting it mildly and we're worried about what that could be saying. I don't want to have to turn in my DL because if my son gets sick at school, I need to be able to go after him. Another thing? He FINALLY gets a home worker whom he really enjoys working with and fully engages with and the company laid her off, what in the heck was THAT all about?! He's made some marvelous breakthroughs now that we had a comprehensive team comprising us, the worker and the school and now they break that up?? What in the heck are they thinking? Or are they thinking at all? Also, today we're going to see if we can get a loan in order to buy our dream home, complete will fully fenced in back yard which will enable the kiddo to run and play outside in the summer without fear of him bolting. I hope we can get it, the benefits of the move would be awesome. Too much to say right now, we're about to head out the door, but will let ya know.

[caffeinated.joy]

Bailybob, the job market everywhere is just messed up. It's sad how employers use the current slump as an excuse to either treat their employees poorly or create unreasonable standards for hiring (demanding a Bachelor's degree in Business Management for a mail clerk job, for example). I'm glad your husband was able to get things worked out. Hopefully this new opportunity turns out to be a good one.

Paden, all I can say is "Ugh". It's a pity they couldn't try to work something out to try avoiding such a disruption in your son's schedule. He can't be dealing well with this. My nephew tends to get really antsy when things change drastically. Good luck with the loan!

[Paden]

Frankly, I'm dreading the day he looks the one woman in the face and says, "I don't like you, go home." He's become so open about expressing things in the proper syntax that it scares me. What bothers me the most is that after she leaves, he backslides quite a bit. The gal has NO CLUE on what it takes to engage his attention and she has no game plan of what to do when she arrives. He refuses to use the flashcards, or the learning games, won't do craft projects with her and prefers to chase the cats down the hallway until one attacks him back and then pins him to the floor by sitting on his head and grooming his hair. Yes, my cats are all addicted to grooming the humans and have the firm belief that feline saliva is the ultimate in hair gel. And she uses BABY TALK with him a good third of the time, despite his making it clear to her that he does NOT like it. If a kid tells you, "I'm NOT a baby," loudly and vehemently, are you going to keep doing it?? No, you're not. She's going to college to work with kids like him and yet, she won't listen to what he is interested in? *beats head on desk*

The loan appointment went well, it looks very promising. The house we want is small yet has features the place we're in now is sorely lacking in, such as closet space! We have ONE closet among three people. We don't even have room for a dining table here or TV trays. ECCCCHT! It would be a perfect spot for a single person and we've made do for as long as we can, but now that he's gotten so big and is making such great progress, it's time for MORE. He's one step away from being able to shower unsupervised by his father or me.

Another gripe?? Eye doctors who only work three days out of a week, if that. Grrrrrrrrrrrr. What is up with that? And why are the frames for eyeglasses so bloody expensive?! Still, it will be worth the expense if I'm able to read things smaller than the usual newspaper print once again instead of needing a ruddy magnifying glass. That gets distracting, to say the least!

I'm not looking forward to the weekend, the mil from hades is coming to spend some time with us; which means locking herself into our son's room and not coming out except for maybe an hour while she's here. Honestly, she treats it like a hotel up here. She arrives, winds the kid up for an hour and makes him mad, then holes up away from everyone and spends most of her time chatting on her phone with her other grandson. Half the time, she leaves to spend time with him and doesn't come back, leaving our kid to wonder what he did wrong. She only comes up here to get away from the moron she married because she doesn't want to be there when he gets home from work. When we ask why she remarried him, all she does is shrug and say she has no clue. It's getting to the point where we're ready to tell her that if she's coming up to see us, leave the cell phone at home. It's not fair to our son when she claims to want to spend time with him and doesn't, plain as that. And when she is out here with us in the family room, all she does is brag about her other grandson and constantly compare the two kids. Sure, our son is autistic, but that doesn't mean he doesn't have feelings that she is hurting. Oh, and she seems to think that we're going to let her use my car constantly once the struts are replaced. Um, NO. Just no. Life is so much less irritating when people use their manners when they visit others and don't act like they need their butts kissed all of the time...