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Author Topic: *NEW* Lost in Reality - chp. 4 posted!!  (Read 7212 times)
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xChessie-x
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« on: January 09, 2008, 05:27:05 pm »

Waking up is so hard now knowing I’ll never hear his voice, touch him, or tell him I love him again.



 It’s been like this for two weeks now. Every noise in my house haunts and teases me with every creaky floor board I hear and every ring of the phone. My heart leaps in hope that he’ll one day just ring up out of the blue or he’ll walk through the door. But I know he won’t. It’s like I’m missing part of my heart, and a plaster (band-aid) has been stuck on - just to keep me going for a couple more days. Until my tears come, and like water on a plaster it comes off and my wound is opened again. Some days, I sit there and cry for hours, in my solitude, my wounds fresh and stinging. The music I put on doesn’t drown out the sound of guilt that I hear my conscious scream at me.



The socialisation and fresh air that people offer me doesn’t help. The last time I got some ‘fresh air’ was when I stepped outside to get some. So I stood just outside the door, breathed in and the ice cold winter air cut straight through me. It just added to the pain inside. Cold and quite breathless, I went back in.



Meanwhile, back in my reality. My eyes look around the room looking for something, I guess. Then, I see at a picture of my sister’s wedding day, I doubt I’ll ever marry now. I’ve lost my soul mate... I feel my mind wondering again. I start to remember the big bout of unrequited love when I was 16, with a guy called Patrick. It never worked out so I figured it just must have been me. I must have been this ugly ginger haired freak that wanted him to love me so much that I tried so hard. It kinda feels like this now as I lay on the sofa. I feel like I’m never going to be loved again, I feel like this is the end of my world, maybe this is the end of my world? I’d cut myself before, when I was younger and swore to my parents that I’d not think about doing it and never do it again. So far I hadn’t – It was like a miniature cure until now. I push the thought out of my mind, and preoccupy myself with a tipple of wine and my favourite TV show. Except this is show is silent and all I hear is his voice playing over and over in my mind like a CD on repeat. Every day he’s gone I hear the Texan accent in his voice that little bit less... It’s just like the image of his face in my mind, just gets weaker. I can’t see him, or hear him again. I’m forbidden...
« Last Edit: January 27, 2008, 09:31:56 am by xChessie-x » Logged

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xChessie-x
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« Reply #1 on: January 09, 2008, 06:54:52 pm »

feel free to comment everyone Smiley
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« Reply #2 on: January 09, 2008, 10:18:11 pm »

Continue, please.
I'd like to read more.
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Chaavik
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« Reply #3 on: January 11, 2008, 03:15:25 am »

Continue with the story please. The beginning was great. No need for anything to be changed since it sounded like a solid beginning with the right elements (or circumstances if you will) to a story about the young woman and her memories.
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« Reply #4 on: January 11, 2008, 07:31:51 pm »



I walked around the shops for the first time in three weeks - only because my cupboards were getting bare. Somehow, I got the feeling that there were more spiders in my cupboards than food.   Today was also a first for many things like showering, cleaning and putting some of the washing that had been building up in the laundry basket for the past three weeks into the washing machine. It felt weird not putting his boxers, socks and various other items in. It made me realise that it was just me now in the house.



Walking around the shop wasn’t the same without him either as he wasn’t putting junk food in the trolley or singing to the music on the supermarket radio – it’s weird how I just missed the little things that he did. I just walked around aimlessly until I saw something I needed. Normally, I liked to make some effort before I walk out my house but today I wore a track suit as it was the last thing I owned that wasn’t on the washing line, and my auburn hair was flopped around my face more lifelessly than ever. My trainers squeaked against the white granite floor as I walked around the aisles. I felt lost.
Another thing that’s weird is that whenever I look bad I always manage to ‘bump into’ people I know! As usual I get the “how are you coping?” and “it must be hard”, but this time it was someone who I hadn’t spoke to in years. He was called Ricky.



Ricky was one of my fiancée’s old mates from school, he was a bit of a sleaze ball back then and he still looked like a creep now. His greasy, black hair stuck to his face, and his breath smelt.
“I didn’t know you shopped ‘ere doll...” Rick said in his husky 40-a-day smoker’s voice.
“I...I...I’m not usually here at this time of the day” I managed to say, without gagging on the reek of this breath.
“You look lost... Come with me, I’ll help you shop. Don’t worry doll”, and then before I could stop him, Ricky had grabbed my basket and had put it inside his shopping trolley “we can catch up while we shop!” he continued.
My face must have looked horrified. I couldn’t think of anything worse but so far he was the only person that hadn’t used “how are you coping?” and “it must be hard” to describe my situation. Yes, he smelt, yes, he had just annoyed me, and no, I wasn’t going to pass up the first offer of male company I’d had in a while.

Rick spoke of his failed marriage of four years to old school friend of mine, and about his two children that were now two and four years old. Then he asked me about how I’d been and I was dumbstruck as I couldn’t think of anything to do, tears came to my eyes as I placed the tin of baked beans into my basket.



“Did I say something?” Rick asked, I guess I’d somewhat adapted to the smell of his breath as I could no longer smell its intensity.
“No...” I replied in a somber tone, then reality hit me.


“It’s just that three weeks ago... Will died”
« Last Edit: January 14, 2008, 12:29:25 pm by xChessie-x » Logged

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Astral Faery
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« Reply #5 on: January 12, 2008, 03:31:01 pm »

This is great!  I love the way you tell your story.  Good descriptions, and good job making us sympathize with your character, helping us see and feel what she does.  I really want to come back for more to find out more about her.  Nicely done.
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« Reply #6 on: January 12, 2008, 06:13:43 pm »

I really like it and will be following closely. Cheesy
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lilroselou
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« Reply #7 on: January 12, 2008, 06:42:09 pm »

this story is great its nice the way it being about one character you don't have to use much dialogue and btw where did you get the nose piercing from? ive looked everywhere for one for my self sim and its driving me crazy!
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xChessie-x
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« Reply #8 on: January 12, 2008, 07:07:58 pm »

it's from the bon voyage EP in the jewellery section.
if not try MTS2 Smiley
i was jumping with excitement when i found nose piercings on the Bon Voyage ep because like yourself i have a nose piercing.
good luck!
x
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xChessie-x
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« Reply #9 on: January 13, 2008, 03:05:42 pm »



Rick looked shocked. I couldn’t believe that I had said what I had so abruptly. Rick stared at me; his eyes seemed to glaze over in a look of disbelief. My reaction was similar when I found out – how could a healthy twenty-nine year old die? Don’t get me wrong, I know it happens – it’s just when it happens to someone you know, someone you love - that’s when it gets hard. I’ll never forget the day when policemen knocked at my door to tell me William had died. That’ll forever be imprinted in my memory. My thoughts were suddenly interrupted by the supermarket intercom. Maybe it was time to say something...

“Rick...? Maybe we should just go pay and talk some more over lunch?” I said hesitantly, I saw him nod so I continued, “Sure, I’ll go home after I’ve finished here and freshen up?” I really needed to freshen up as I didn’t fancy looking a tramp in a restaurant. The restaurant I had in mind was café la international from what I’d heard it was alright, the food wasn’t too filling and it was affordable.

“Have you got paper and a pen?” I asked Rick

“Yep, ‘ere ya go doll.” Rick replied handing me a receipt from his pocket and a pen from a near-by shelf. I wrote the café I wanted to meet at and a time.

“See you then” I said to him as I turned and walked towards the till.



My blue basket banged against my leg as I walked, hitting my thigh harder sometimes than others. I started to think as I carried on walking across the store. I was on leave from work, and I hadn’t been to the ATM in days – would I have any money? I highly doubted I had - so when I got to the till I opened my purse cautiously and to my relief I saw a $50 tucked away at the back. I hoped my shopping might come to a total close to this or I’d have to loan some money off Rick. The checkout girl calculated my shopping total and to my amazement it came to $49.28! I handed over my lucky note, and hoped I’d have more uplifting moments like these to come...



Three hours later, Rick and I were sat down in the restaurant, and shortly after we’d ordered beverages Rick said he’d pay. Maybe he saw the lack of money I had earlier in the supermarket, I offered to go half with him but he refused to have it. Suddenly, I smelt mint, and to my surprise Rick it smelled like he’d brushed his teeth!

The waitress came back around, so I ordered my favourite pork chops, and Rick ordered the same for himself. When we finally got our meal, Rick and I started to talk more as the mood lightened.

“You know if you ever need someone to talk to I’m always here” Rick offered.

“Thanks, it was nice to spend some time catching up” I replied.

It was nice that he’d thought to say that, I just hoped that if I did want to talk I’d want to listen. I haven’t really had much luck with my friends, most of them are married with children and they seem to have other things to preoccupy their minds, without worrying about me as well... I felt this hand touch me under the table. My legs snapped together, and pulled back to my body quickly.



“WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?!” I snapped.

Rick looked shocked; “I thought you invited me out for a date!” he replied angrily, “You’re a beautiful woman and your single...what else was I meant to think!”

I could see his confusion but I couldn’t believe that he’d try it on when it was obvious I’d been upset beforehand! “You disgust me, I thought were shocked or something, not working out a way to get in my pants, dumb ass!” I yelled, at this point I was stood up, making the whole restaurant look in the direction of our table. “You should have stayed away from the creep” my conscious told at me – it was a bit too late for that I thought.



I tossed and turned all night in my sleep. I opened my eyes and saw my alarm clock was beaming the time 3:42 across my bedroom. This was the fifth time this week that I’d had disrupted sleep. I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and slid my warm body out of my newly washed blue duvet. My feet touched the ground – the laminate was freezing!I cursed the weather and walked from my bedroom to the kitchen, and then in the stillness of the night I saw Will.



I knew it was due to tiredness, but it reminded me how much I missed him and when I walked over to where he was stood and then he disappeared. Tears fell down from my eyes, fast and heavy, until I collapsed in a heap. “Come back Will...I...I...miss you” I called out in between sobs into the emptiness of my house, and in that moment I realized I couldn’t remember the last time I had a period...
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xChessie-x
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« Reply #10 on: January 14, 2008, 12:31:53 pm »

this story has been called Reminisce, and Fighting the pain inside.
on further thinking i thought neither suited the story.
and this is it's new final name Lost in Reality
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Astral Faery
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« Reply #11 on: January 14, 2008, 01:16:14 pm »

Aw, so sad it makes me want to cry.  I really feel for her and am sorry for her loss.  I hope she eventually has a happy life.  That remark about her snapping her legs shut had me lauging, lol.  Great update - can't wait to read more.
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« Reply #12 on: January 14, 2008, 04:51:29 pm »

Great story!Hope to hear even more!
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« Reply #13 on: January 15, 2008, 02:23:45 pm »

thanks for the nice comments everyone Cheesy

chapter 4 is currently in the making - will be posted on Sunday or sooner Smiley
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xChessie-x
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« Reply #14 on: January 19, 2008, 04:51:47 pm »

feel free to leave comments if you read this Cheesy
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