Top 10 Reasons I hate General Fitness Gyms

[kaoz666]

10.) That many elliptical machines and treadmills in one place is only a good idea if the entire squad of Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders train at the gym in nothing but spandex and sports bras.

9.) If it took you five years to gain five pounds of muscle and you think that is an accomplishment, I am sure there is work for you in our US Congress.

8.) 14" is only big when discussing Smurfs, penile length or cesarean scars.

7.) No, I don't care that you can do neck bridges for 15 minutes straight. You still can't balance the bar on a bench press and I need that space for corner T-Bar Rows.

6.) Gee, you trained twice a week last week. Congrats.

5.) You are the only reason there is now a Starbucks where my squat rack used to be.

4.) Functional at what?

3.) One of us has a greater chance of being mugged by a group of slender high school kids...and it ain't me.

2.) Baby carrots?

1.) I was once just like you...but the fifth grade was only two semesters long.