A friend asked me to post this...

Here is a message from a former InSim member.

Hi all from Brat

Let me say that this journey has not been an easy one for me. Ever since
I fell down the stairs that night on June 5th because I passed out I have
had to alter my life.

I was given what should have been a simple treatment with a drug called Prednisone
starting on July 9th, mine was a large dose. This was done to elimate
the inflamation in my lungs. I was warned that this was an agressive treatmentby my
Pulmonologist. I was one of the unlucky few that exhibited a medical induced psychosis
as a side effect of this drug. Within 72 hours of starting the Prednisone I started
seeing and hearing things and acting out aggressively. I called my pulmonologist and
expressed my concerns about the depression, nervousness, confusion, paranoia, rage
episodes, hallucinations and memory lose I was having. After 5 day I had Physical
side efects of muscle pain,pain in hips, shoulders and back, severe joint pain, blurred
vision, fatigue and weakness and chest pains during rage episodes. This message was
fully not passed along to my pulmonologist, due to a foul up with the computers at
his answering service. The only part of message he got was about the chest pains and
insomnia.He wasn't inform depression, nervousness, confusion, paranoia, rage episodes
and hallucinations or he would have discontinued the medicationat once. He prescribed
nitro for the pain and I got a voice message that insomnia was a side effect of the
drug at my dosage level. I slept maybe about 4 hours a day and usually 2 hours here
and 1 hour or 30 to 45 minute naps. I misunderstood his voice message think that was
the USUAL side effect of the drug. By the time I finally couldn't handle the basket
case I become and talked to my pulmonologist in person, I let him know what was
going on with me mentally, I had become dependent on the Prednisone had had to be weaned
off of it.

Anybody that feels I treated them badly I apologize, but compare to I put my Family
through you had it easy. I was hell to be around and live with my family watch my
mode swings. I was lucky that I physical did not act out against my family, but
there were times it took that last ounce of my restraint not to, there were a few
times I did get right up in people faces with a clinched fist.
One night at the end of July, I had a bad night and tried to hurt myself.
I really don’t remember why that at that level of Prednisone it plays with your memory
if your sensitive to the medication...

I had more test and doctors appointments.

Then I found out a friend of 20 years of me and my wife had cancer, I held her
son when he was only 2 hours old. One night she was pushed down the stairs by her husband.
Her Husband would not drive her to the clinic or call an ambulance. I drove 60 mile
out to her house at 2 am and drove her to Parkland hospital. I waited for her until
they saw her 8 hours later and checked her in. She had 14 hair line fracture virtabra,
she is luck that she can still walk. She sang at my wedding and has a beautiful voice.

My Thoracic Surgeon did mince words with me; and he is one of the best in the area,
“Mr. Brat your lungs look like ground glass inside from your cat scans”. So I had
an open biopsy of my lungs, it is not a pleasant experience.

They knock me out with an injection. Then they place the IV tube in my neck to be
close to the heart in case the heart stops while I was knock out. While I underwent
the procedure here’s what happen to me:
The Surgeon cuts three holes in the side with my largest lung. Mine was on the
right side. They spread your ribs apart. Then I had sample of my lungs tissue taken.
Mine was from various locations total a square inch, or for my metric friends 25mm
square. When the Surgeon was finishing up the last thing that happen to me was drainage
tube was placed into me; mine was 3/8 by 18 inches. You live that with inside you for
3 days. They hook you to a device that drains fluid out of your chest cavity and place
a vacuum on it. Then you wake up. If you had a broken rib that describes the pain.
If you haven’t broken rib imagine you have a jack hammer hit your in the side in set on
full. It was painful to the point of tears to take a deep breath, cough or touch that part
of my body. You get a Morphine pain button or as I called it my best friend in the
universe. I hurt for weeks as Moon cat can tell you, I go ouch a lot talking to her on
the phone.

My lungs are a tipping point you see I was diagnosed with smoker’s lung.
I smoked for 25 years and was exposed to my dad’s second hand smoke for 7 years on top
of that, back in the 1960 and 1970s there wasn’t the medical evidence about second smoke
that we have now. I will have to have cat scans ever six months or so to see if I develop
cancer.

I write this not for your sympathy, I had some teachable moments in the past few months.
Please learn from my mistakes and live a Tobacco Free Life especially if you have a family
history of cancer. If you smoke, quit, and if you have to, don’t do it in confided areas
around other especially kids. You must be proactive about your and your love ones health.
When your prescibe medication find out about the possible side effects. Ask lots of question
of your Medical providers. Ask whats the worst case that can happen durring any course of
treatment especially if you hear the word "agressive". Ever hear the term "Little Stick".
IF your love starts to exhibit a behavior change, or tells you that their see or hearing
things after starting any coarse of any medication the get in contact with their Physician
and talk directly with their Physician, and express your concern of their behavior change
emdiately.

Its not all bad, One side effect of the Prednisone is that I total lost my appetite. My stomach
shrank and I started eat lowwer carb and fat diet. I lost 18 pounds (8 KG) of fat and now am
working on rebuilding my stamina. Mooncat and I have become friends and shes a great person
she is smart and has a great heart.

I not on this site anymore because I lashed out during on of my delusional episodes and said
some very hurtful things I did stupid things over on ISA. I feel ashamed of that, but I have to
except that it happened and moved on. I ask you not to judge my actions that happen at worst
time in my life but, remember me by the old happy baby avitar.

Have a happy and wonderfully life.