'Nother update! See, I promised I would!
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Fear gripped my heart after my mother had been gone for three months. Something had happened; I could feel it in my veins. There was pain coursing through my body, and it was all I could do to not cry out. Something had gone terribly wrong, and I knew this with a certainty as the rain beat down on the windows. Even as I slept during the day, I could feel anxiety rising inside my unbeating heart. Night could not come quick enough for me.
The house was a mess. I knew Aiden was out in the garage working on one experiment or another. The girls were in their room, packing their belongings, preparing to go off to college, and yet, here I was, barely able to stand for the fear and the pain and the anxiety that struck me then. I did not want to scream, did not want to alarm my family, but something nagged at my mind and I was afraid and I didn’t want to be alone.
I tried to gather my strength, tried to gather my wits, but I couldn’t stop the tears from flowing. My body shook violently, and I gave up my struggle. If something bad happened to my mother, then I would mourn. I could hardly hear anything over my own sobs, so I didn’t notice Aiden enter the room, and scoop me up into a hug, concern flooding his features. I could feel his warmth and my coldness. I could feel his heart beating against my still one. I could touch the differences between us, and my only hope then was to be able to return to my former self, to go back in time and pretend that none of this had ever happened.
Alas, this is a wish that could never be granted. For several days, I heard nothing from my mother, and though I tried to hide my anxiety from my family, they knew something was wrong. Our house is small, so my emotions permeated every wall and every room. A blanket of despair settled over our house much like the snow that had fallen the previous night. With my heightened sense of hearing, I could tell that everyone in the house, including the dog, was asleep, even as I stood on the back porch, feeling no change in temperature at all. It was a weird sensation. Even now, in the winter and cooler months, I’ll put on a jacket or a coat only because I’m used to doing so. I still do many things only of habit.
When I returned to the kitchen, I was surprised. There was someone waiting for me, unbeknownst to everyone in the house. I stood at the back door, my body limp, unable to believe what I saw before me. His cheeks were colored; he was fresh from feeding. The dog slumbered quietly, and just down the hall, it appeared as if the doors to my family’s bedrooms hadn’t been bothered. Yet, how could I tell if they had? He had gotten into my home without me knowing; he’d gotten in without alarming anyone. He motioned for me to sit down, something I was reluctant to do. Given his last visit, I was unsure if I should be on my guard. Something about him now said that a world had passed between us. Something in him had shifted after our last encounter, something in him that I could not see.
“You are afraid of me.”
Such a simple declaration! A sentence spoken no louder than the whispers of the dead seemed to boom through the quiet house. I wanted to cover my ears, but I knew this was irrational. There was no need. I was jumpy, and I felt I had reason.
“I did not disturb them. I do not care about them. It is you I am here for.”
I walked around the table, my guard up, ready at a moments notice to jump on him if he showed any sign of hostility.
“Would you like a cup of tea?”
I noticed cups sitting on the table, steam rising from them as if this meeting were an innocent gathering between friends.
“I do find it interesting that you have taken a mortal family. Born children of your own body. We do not usually do those things. Pain…death…suffering…we know these things all too easily.”
I sat down in a chair further away from him. The steaming cup scraped across the table as he gently pushed it toward me. His hands were warm. His eyes still pierced the darkness around us, vibrant, all-knowing.
“Where is my mother? Why hasn’t she called or sent me a letter?”
“I’m afraid she’s fallen on some hard times. Nothing at my hands, I assure you. She is my most prized possession, and I would do nothing to harm her. Others, I believe, are not so…protective of your mother.”
My eyes hardened and he held his palms to me in a gesture of surrender. He was meaning no harm. My head started to spin. I’d known something was wrong, and yet I had no way of getting in touch with my mother. I had no way of knowing, truly for myself, if she was ok.
“Others believe that she has a special gift--”
“What? What gift? She is no different from you or I!”
“That is where you are wrong, dear. See, you are a rarity among us, and we’d all love to have your secret. Many vampires still cling to their human lives as you have done. Do not deny it! You have continued to live a mortal life, and it is your difference that lets you continue to do so in a way that I never could. You have married a mortal man, gave birth to four mortal children, and yet you feed on mortal blood. You have a vampire’s strength, a vampire’s hearing, a vampire’s sight! You have all the positives, and yet…you lack the negatives. You don’t have what makes us weak, and there are those who believe that this is a gift! They want your mother, they want to be bitten by her, hoping all the while that they won’t be dead, hoping that when they wake, she will have given them the power to walk in sunlight!”
I stared back in amazement. I knew that I was different, not that I was coveted. The thought of me being different hardly crossed my mind anymore. I hadn’t thought of it since that night my mother and I looked out over the city. I hadn’t thought of it since she left…. It was my existence that cause my mother pain. For a few seconds, there was no doubt in my mind what I had to do. I was nearly set in my ways until the man across from me protested.
“You must not! You are a gem, a rare jewel among us, and to loose you would be—“
“To loose me? It was you who tried to kill me, or have you forgotten? You tried to destroy my family, tear us apart at the seams! You took advantage of my mother, you took advantage of your grief! If only you had been more of the gentleman you are playing at now, none of us would be in this situation. My mother wouldn’t be fighting for her life, I wouldn’t be some…coveted object sought out by vampires from around the world! I wouldn’t be here—“
“And neither would your family. I will not deny that I wanted you dead, even tried to kill you myself. I will not deny that I want your mother, though she will not have me, I will not deny that I do find your presence annoying—“
I turned away from him, the anger subsiding in me. So my mother was merely inconvenienced by my existence. I hugged myself, tears again welling in my eyes.
“They have tried force. You cannot, however, force one vampire to bite anyone. It has to be of their own free will. She has left several cities before she intended to. Sometimes she is pursued. Of course, you would expect this whole ordeal to gather a lot of attention from mortals as well.”
He fell into silence. I was glad my back was to him. My every emotion now seemed heightened, and I knew that he was toying with me. He’d come back, not to deliver comforting news about my mother, but to toy with me. He wanted something. Perhaps he, himself, wanted to know what happened; what had caused me to turn out this way? What allowed me to walk in the sun? Laughter burst from my lips, try as I might to contain it.
“You hold onto your mortal emotions as if they were your life.”
“I did not ask for this! If there were some…cure, I’d take it in a heartbeat! I’d take it, and I’d drink it and I’d not regret a moment of this undead life! You think that I am mortal because I can walk in the sun? Ha! Every second I’m in the sun it burns. My skin will smoke, and yes, there are things I can do to prolong my stay outside during the day, but it is an altogether uncomfortable experience that I’d much rather do without! The night offers no comfort for me, either! Every time I touch my husband, I know that I am not mortal! I know that I am not the same as he is, and I know that I can never again feel my heart beat. I will not be able to see my daughters off to college because I will be in the sun too long. People around me will notice my skin smoking! Umbrellas are of little help to me! Yes, my body will heal each night, yes, I’m pretty sure I dream, yes, I may live closer to mortal life than you do, but…this is no life to live. I don’t want to be stuck between the day and the night! I don’t want to live in twilight!”
“If I had a cure, then, you would take it?”
“In a heartbeat! Do you have one?”
My question was met with silence, and I turned to face him, anger again boiling underneath my cold skin.
“Do not toy with me! Do you have a cure?”
