Chapter 4December 15It’s been 3 days since Kevin went home and he has called me every day since. We have talked about everything including ways for us to make our relationship work. I decided that I’m not going to waist any more time on Jonathan. If he didn’t want me just because I’m sick then I don’t want him. Kevin graduates in 5 months and then he plans to go to college here in California that or start his own rock band with me as lead singer. I told him that he didn’t want to hear me sing. He admitted to me that when I was showering in our bathroom attached to our room he would listen to me singing in the shower and he loved every moment of it. I just cringe at the thought of him listening to that. I suck at singing.
December 16Today I got big big news. I’m doing so well since my chemo treatments that they are letting me go home tomorrow so I will be able to spend Christmas with my family. I called Kevin to tell him right away. He is really the only one I have left to share anything with. Most of my friends totally ditched me when I went into the hospital. Kevin says he has a surprise for me for Christmas. I have no idea how he is going to get it to me but hey whatever floats his boat. I told mom I wanted to get him something. She said she would go pick it out but I’m dying to go shopping. She is worried about me going out but I told her we would go to one store and we wouldn’t spend more than an hour in there. So tomorrow morning as soon as I’m discharged moms going to take me out. I can’t wait.
December 24thI know it’s been a long time since I have written but things have been getting so much better for me that I’ve kind of been forgetting to write, oopps!! Tonight when we had sat down for Christmas Eve dinner the phone rang and mom said it was for me. Normally she doesn’t let me talk on the phone during dinner but for some reason tonight she did. When I answered it you would not believe who it was…. It was Kevin. He told me that he had a surprise for me and that he needed me to go over to the window in the living room. I looked outside but it was pretty dark and I couldn’t see anything well that was until his face met mine with just a thin pane of glass in between us. I opened the door and jumped into his arms. I was so happy to see him. He came in and ate dinner with us and is now sleeping on the couch downstairs. I kind of want to sneak down there and talk to him but I know dad would flip on me so for now Ill just stay here and dream about him.
January 4thI just got back from getting some blood work done and guess what??? My cancer is in remission!!! I’m not sick anymore. School starts tomorrow and I can finally go back. My hair is starting to grow back in a little too. Mom says the school is allowing me to wear a hat until my hair looks more normal. Kevin is leaving to go back home today too. It was so nice to spend the past week and a half with him. It was nice to have him with me when I got the news about being well again too. He took me out to lunch and to the mall. It was so wonderful. My life is finally turning back around.
January 18thJonathan decided to finally come up and talked to me today. He said he was sorry for not talking to me but he was scared that I was never going to get better again. He kissed me and gave me a hug and told me that he would pick me up at 7 tomorrow for the winter dance. I have no idea what I’m going to do. I don’t think I like Jon anymore. I know that I love Kevin and there has to be a big difference between love and like right? I guess I will just go to the dance and see what happens. It couldn’t be too bad, right?
January 20thThe dance was so confusing. Jon picked me up at 7 like he said and brought me flowers and everything. He was being so sweet. At the dance we pretty much danced and he even made sure I was feeling ok just about every 5 minutes. He would sit down with me when I needed to and got me punch. By the end of the night it was like nothing ever happened. We were kissing and hugging and making out like we used to. I don’t know what to do.
