Re: The Dumbest Thing Your Spouse/SO has Ever Said or Done

[Theraven]

That ex probably gave you a hint that she wanted glassware...
But to not know it's your own baby... she must have been confused because of the sedation or something.  

[DaSpecial1]

Ok this one is an action my daughter did, .  

She calls me from her bedroom, which always bugs me. I couldn't hear her plus I was engrossed in computer stuff so I asked her to come in my room and get my glasses (intending to get her in the room so she could tell me what it was she wanted).

She took a few minutes and I had just gotten to a critical fix when she comes into my room, hands me my glasses, then goes back into her room and continues to shout a question from way in there.

I'd just stared at her from my room, so she says "What?? I figured you needed your glasses so you could hear me better," grinning like she does whenever she drives me bananas.

I guess I deserved it...it is harder to hear without my glasses on.

[Hullabaloo]

...it is harder to hear without my glasses on.

I know what you mean, seriously. When I'm not wearing my glasses I feel as if I were in another dimension.

One night I went out with two friends. We were in a pub and the music was so loud I couldn't hear a word they said. I was astonished because they were talking and talking with no problem at all, so, after fifteen minutes, more or less, I asked to the one who was sitting next to me -"I can't hear anything. What the hell is she talking about?"- and she answered -"I don't know but I nod, say 'yup' or 'ahaa!' and she keeps on talking happily"-. When my other friend found out what was happening she shouted "You are such a b****!" And then we began to laugh hysterically. Stupid , I know.

[SenkoTwiik]

Got another one of B's nutty sleeptalk.
We were laying in bed last night, and he was asleep, but suddenly rolled over and said to me, "Thanks Babe."

I said, "For what?"
He answers, "Peeew, Peeew, Peeeew (making gunshot noises with his mouth)"
I just told him to go back to sleep because I didn't know what he was talking about.

 

[Ruffnut]

One of the most dumbest things my husband did ever since we were dating, was walk around the room screaming where is my cell phone, cursing colorfully and blaming me for keeping room a mess. It was in his hand all along

[SenkoTwiik]

The other day when we were at the store, I told Brandon I needed some Muslin (waxing) strips, and he was like, "Muslim strips? What? That's racist! Did they call the strips that because they think Muslims are too hairy?"

He felt stupid when I explained that they were MusLIN strips, not MusLIM strips.

[Ruffnut]

When we go shopping my husband always has to make sure we got everything.
Hubby: We got everything?
Me: yes.
H: Need anything?
M: Got all i need.
H: You sure?
M: Aye.
H: Okey then.
M: You got everything YOU need?
H: yeah, i'm fine, let's go check out.
While walking home he suddenly yells," CRAP! I forgot Dr. Pepper!" I just 

[Paden]

That last one sounds very familiar to me, as well. Hubby can't function very well with too much blood in his Dr. Pepper stream.

[Ruffnut]

That last one sounds very familiar to me, as well. Hubby can't function very well with too much blood in his Dr. Pepper stream.

Same here. it's like air to him, got me hooked too 

[Jenna]

So the other day...

Her: Gah! The ice cream is completely melted!
Me: How'd that happen?
Her: Well, I left it out on the counter to thaw, and...*facepalm*
Her: Let's pretend that didn't happen...

[Ruffnut]

oh my god XD

I just run to the store few minutes ago, because my husband needed soda for work. So I loaded 6 20 oz bottles in a bag and half a block away from my house the bag brakes open and bottles fly all over the place(thank god they didn't fiz!) SO I pick them up and walk the rest way home with bottles in my hands and I shout for hubby once I am home to help me out. He comes down stairs and stares at me and the bottles," What happened?" I sigh and say," Bag ripped open and bottles went flying all over the place..." he replied," they didn't fall on the ground did they?"  Me:

[SenkoTwiik]

Haha, no, they literally grew wings and flew all over the place.

I was at the clinic with Brandon and the kids, and there was a cartoon with a Kangaroo in it. The Kangaroo had an Australian accent, so I asked B:

"Why did they make the Kangaroo have such an overdone Australian accent? It's obviously fake."

Brandon replies:

"I don't know, maybe it's a vampire."

O.o Serious?

[Ruffnut]

oh god, I LOL'd. How is vampire and Australia related? XD

Hubby just told me I'm a waste, because when ever he makes coffee, i don't drink it and just leave it there( i just like my coffee cold) So I tell him that.
Hubby: well you can just put ice cubes in it!
Me: Too watery that way.
H: Well coffee is made with water anyway.

No duh, Sherlock!

[DaSpecial1]

Ok you guys almost made me hurt myself laughing.  First the amazing trick ice cream that melts when warm lol, then OMG the bag rips and he asks what?! and vampire kangaroos with aussie accents ?  Have some pity folks, a pregnant woman can't hold her water so easily .

[Ruffnut]

DaSpecial1: Congrats on pregnancy, and I apologize for my hubbies silliness

This was not done by my husband, but it got me laughing. My husband, our mutual friend Daniel, his friend Rebecca and I went to play pool(it's our little thing we do it once in a while). Dave(hubby) and I got into a silly argument and we were screaming at each other, so Daniel barges in and says," Before this comes to divorce, go poke some balls with a stick!" After moment of silence we all broke in to laughter.

Later Daniel leans on Dave shoulder with his elbow. Both watch us(girls) play pool and the Dave decides to do the grab motion and scream "YEAH!" Daniel never realized that Dave tried to grab his ass a joke and I kept laughing( and still am) about this. We then just laughed like idiots and blamed it on the chalk. It must have had crack in it or something XD