Re: The Dumbest Thing Your Spouse/SO has Ever Said or Done

[SenkoTwiik]

I didn't do this, but my husband did. It's by far not the dumbest thing he has done, but it's the most recent.

He just got off work and I called him on his cell phone and asked him to stop by the store on the way home to pick up bread, milk, lettuce and avacados. He said okay, and then called me back once he got to the store to go over the list of what he had to get. I told him, and then he picked up *everything* and came home.

He returned with bread and milk. He was just barely in the door when I was like, "Where's the lettuce, B? and the avacados?" He just looked at me and was like, "CRAP!"

[Katie]

haha, I would be the one to do that!  

Today I acted like a total idiot around Karli and Kody's dad. He told me I wa sbarking up the wrong tree when I threated Karli, cause she bit me.

even more embarrassing, He kept on telling Kody he would shave his head if he didn't cut his hair, and he would pants him if he didn't pull up his pants.  

[DaSpecial1]

Senko our spouses must be related.  My spouse called me to say he'd done most of the grocery shopping and was checking to see if I wanted anything additional.   I asked, "Are you all done already?" He says "Yep I was just about to drive off and thought I'd check with you."   OK so I say all I'd like is eggplant.  He says "Fresh one or baked lasagna?" (i.e., eggplant lasagna) I say "both".  

So he comes in two hours later.  I'm getting ready to fix dinner and I ask him "Where's the eggplant?"  He says "Aw man I knew I forgot something!" <---insert look of stunned disbelief here

[Katie]

what!?  

[DaSpecial1]

  That's what I said...

[SenkoTwiik]

Good old husbands, and their lack of brains at certain times. I bet he got sidetracked or something. Mine always does. He starts thinking about his videogame waiting for him at home and loses his mind.

[Jenna]

My exboyfriend was good for that. He called and asked me one day what brand of smokes I wanted from the gas station. I told him, and ten minutes later he brings me over a pack of cigars.

"Well they didn't have your brand," he said.
"So you picked up cigars?" I responded.
"I figured they were good enough..."
"You're right; these will hurt more when I shove 'em up your arse for being so dumb..."

[SenkoTwiik]

I think maybe good-looking (or sometimes butt-ugly, depending on the guy's taste) walk by or something when they're supposed to be remembering and it just flies out of their head so their brains can go into "pants mode".

[DaSpecial1]

Man now you guys made me think of another one.  So I'm talking to my sis on the phone, and my spouse walks by and asks:  "Did you want something?"

So I ask my sis to hang on for a sec & I say " Thanks, sure! do we have anything cold here? I'd like something cool. "  

He says like "ice cream?"

I say "sure" then I go back to chatting with my sister who comments on how thoughtful he is.  A few seconds later she laughs hysterically when she hears him say:

"Here you go, we were out of ice cream so I microwaved you some popcorn." <---me

Oooo how very thoughtful, a nice hot bag of popcorn ought to cool me off nicely, thanks hon...well that's what I was thinking.  I was too surprised to actually say anything.

To this day my smart-alec older sis asks if I want popcorn--"ya know just in case you're hot or thirsty."

[Katie]

lmaoo nice ^ haha, that's wonderfull! Lemme think of a good one...  

[SenkoTwiik]

That is just hysterical.

Last Easter, (my husband and I had been together for three years almost, married for going on 2 of them) we were at my mother-in-law's house and she really gets into Easter. She had a big bag of fruit snacks and juices for Daemian, some little toys and things like that (since we asked her not to give him candy), and then she had a candy basket for Brandon and I. She specifically said "Brandon, make sure Jamie doesn't eat any of the 3 Musketeers with the red wrappers. Those are cherry so they're all yours."

Brandon says, "Mom, I'm not that much of a pig. Jamie can have some, I'm not going to keep them all to myself."

Before I can say anything back, Brandon's mom replies, "Son, your wife is deathly allergic to cherry. Remember?"

[DaSpecial1]

  Oh lord you're gonna make me pass out. I couldn't catch my breath for a second.  Aww, we're like twins well at least our spouses are...

[SenkoTwiik]

Another incredibly dumb thing he does on occasion.

Brandon: I have to poo.
Me: Make sure you get a roll of toilet paper out of the cupboard, there's no more in the bathroom.
Brandon: Okay hun (heads down the hall)

30 minutes later

Brandon: Babe, will you bring me some toilet paper. There isn't any in here!

[soulofthesea]

lol. if I knew that this thread was going to turn into the "Dumbest Things Your Husband/Boyfriend Said", I would've named this thread that!

[DaSpecial1]

I guess we do need a thread for that.  Only it should be  "Dumbest Things Your Partner/Spouse Said".


Maybe we could start one and move the last posts to it?  I have no clue how to.